This is a passage written in the voice of a younger me; in a time when I still believed that being hurt was normal, that this was how everyone lived, and that I was loved. The innocence stolen, the trust broken, and the bond never to be.

My mommy is tall and has brown hair, just the same as mine,

When she pulls me by it, I start to cry, and she yells that I’ll be fine.

My mommy lets people hurt me even though I am so small,

My eyes are red, black and blue and she doesn’t mind at all.

My mommy is very sweet to me when others are around,

But at home she’s always mad at me and throws me on the ground.

My mommy is like superwoman, so mighty and so strong,

She can hit me really hard, sometimes all day long.

My mommy couldn’t have realized just how much pain I felt,

Otherwise she would have never hit me so much with her belt.

My mommy likes my sisters a lot and treats them really nice,

But she doesn’t like me or my brother, and we don’t know why.

My mommy cries sometimes after she gets really mad,

But not because I’m crying, must be because I’m bad.

My mommy told me that she wishes I was never born,

I guess that’s why she treats me with hostility and scorn.

My mommy cares about me sometimes, at least I think she does,

Although she doesn’t say she loves me or ever give me hugs.

My mommy scares me all the time and my little brother too,

Sometimes I wish we could fly away, far to somewhere new.

My mommy is my mommy even if it doesn’t show,

So I have to live with all the hurt, and never let it go.

If I were to die today, I wonder what she’d do,

And if it would matter if I said, “But Mommy, I Love You”