When I was 12, I was enrolled in my first year of middle school. As a sixth grader, I was quite excited for my new fresh start, to be a new person. I had established myself well, and while I was far from popular, I had a solid group of friends and no enemies as far as I knew.
And then came P.E.
Down South, everyone always wants P.E during the first quarter or the fourth. Anything in between means being stuck in freezing cold for the outdoors activities or stuck dancing with the opposite gender, and no awkward 11 or 12-year-old whose only love reference was Disney Channel wants that. I was lucky enough to get P.E during the fourth quarter. I felt I was in a good place. I had almost made it through my first year of middle school with a fabulous report card (my first A in math!). Life was great.
But then I accidentally slammed into a girl. I was trying to catch a ball.
She was one of those girls who looks at everyone with disdain, as if she can't imagine what's so important that you have to use your disgusting mouth to speak to her. I knocked her to the ground.
After making sure I had the ball in my hand, I got up and apologized before turning around to return the ball. But she wasn't done with me. When I returned, she immediately snapped, asking if I needed new glasses and who was so stupid as to not know where they were going. Apparently me. Her friends glowered at me.
I had never dealt with anyone like her. I stuttered another apology, becoming more confused when she continued to seek me out in an attempt to prove I was less than dirt to her. After I got over the shock of this enemy, I realized that this wasn't going to end if I just stood there opened-mouthed.
I wanted to yell at her, insult her hair, her makeup, everything. But I realized something.
Wouldn't that just prove everything she said? If I was really so horrible, snapping would prove her right. So the next day, I brought her candy. After a surprise look, she took it and proclaimed she was going to throw it out. She didn't. I saw. Her friends didn't snicker. They glanced at each other, unsure.
I was complimenting her everyday, making sure she knew her makeup was great, her dress was lovely, etc.
And one day, her friend stood up and snapped at the girl to stop, because she was being really mean to me. She looked shocked. Her friend pulled her aside and after an hour, I got a mumbled apology.
I never became friends with her, but I learned something. It was hard to sit and let her hurt me, but in the end, even though I never really took part, I won the war.
Kindness won the war.