"Every cloud has a silver lining."
-Proverb.
Life isn't easy. We all go through tough times now and again. The real world isn't a video game where when you make a mistake you can just hit the restart button and get a do-over.
You actually have to stand up and face these problems head on. And that part is rarely ever enjoyable. After all, it's no fun to tread through life's most difficult, heart-wrenching moments. Take it from me, I’ve been knocked down several times in life. I had to pick up the scattered pieces all around me. It was up to me to learn how to find light in a situation no matter the severity. I learned all this from losing my mother. Although it is upsetting that event molded me into the person I am today. It taught me that no matter how rough things get, there's always something good that can be gleaned. Even from the toughest of times.
It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that most of us prefer good situations opposed to bad. Let's be real. We are all merely human. It is only natural to attempt to avoid trouble as much as possible. Yet trouble is always lurking around the corner ready to pounce on its next victim. It seems as though no matter what we do trouble follows. Sort of like that stray cat you just can't seem to shake. It is in these moments of turmoil that we are forced to ask ourselves, “why me?” Why are so many negative things occurring in my life? Because of this, we often turn on ourselves and begin to fall into a ditch of depression. We resort to pushing away our family and friends, but that isn't the answer. God doesn't punish people for his own entertainment. He has a master plan. Yes, sometimes his plan may not make sense, but in the end, it will make you a stronger person. Regardless, there will be moments in life that test you. We weren't built to outrun the storm forever.
It is the tough situations that define you. They mold you, shape you, and test just how strong you are. These situations will never be easy. Yet it is in these make or break moments when your determination and resolve are put to the ultimate test, that you find out a lot about who you are.
Will you cave under the pressure? Or are you going to rise to the occasion? Will you crumble in the heat of battle? Or are you a warrior who will persevere through the difficulties coming out on top? Will you give up or give in when things don't go your way? Or will you discover the power that lies within?
I matured faster than most people do when tragedy struck my family. I lost my mother in a car accident and it was one of the hardest moments in my life that I ever had to deal with. I felt lost and alone; the woman who was supposed to be there to guide me and love me was now gone. I remember blaming myself for her loss, although in reality I had no control over the situation.
From this, I learned that whenever life knocks you down, there's one of two choices to make. You can choose to lie down in the dirt with a bloody nose and wallow around in self-pity giving up on yourself. Or you can stand up and fight back. Garner something positive, something worthwhile from the tough lessons learned.
I did exactly that. I found the silver lining in my bleak situation.
I learned that the quickest way to get back on track is to get up, get better and get going again. That doesn't mean you should jump up and just keep doing whatever it was that got you in a jam in the first place. It obviously didn't work the first time, so why in the world would it work the second time around?
Newsflash -- it won't.
I began to focus on the positives in my situation; instead of focusing on my mother's death, I focused on her life. I instead remembered the kind of person she was. I cherished all the wonderful mother-daughter moments we shared: her laugh, her smile. Anything and everything positive about her I kept close to my heart.
I learned that it's important in a situation that takes a bad turn to look at what went wrong. Then figure out a way to get it right. Only then can you get back in the game. When you strike out in baseball, do you just decide to quit? Definitely not! You fix your swing and then the next time you're up at bat show that pitcher what you're really made of. Sitting around sulking about the sorry hand you've been dealt won't get you anywhere. You can't dwell on what went wrong. You need to find something good within the bad and then go out to do it better, smarter, and more efficiently.
Although I am strong there are still moments where I break. I'm not saying that I am invincible because none of us is. All I am saying is that your happiness and positivity stems from how you handle the hard times in life. We all have moments where we break and just need someone to hold us while we cry. It's a basic human instinct to crave the feeling of protection. Which is what we search for in those moments of dread. Difficult moments such as the loss of a loved one aren't like losing a pet fish. It's not like you can cry for a few days and then replace the dead fish with a live fish. I lost a person. A person that can't ever be replaced. As much as I would love to go back in time and still be with her, I know that this will never happen, that it is only fairy tale. I became afraid of people realizing that although I had this tough exterior I was falling apart on the inside. Later though I realized it's OK to cry. Crying doesn't make you weak; it expresses your emotions and shows your vulnerability. It takes a strong person to let these walls fall down for others to see. I became a fighter from my vulnerability. It molded me into the independent strong woman I am today. From this, I learned that everything was going to be OK. I could get through this.
It doesn't take a whole lot to be happy and upbeat when things are going your way. When the sun is shining just the way you like it and everything in your life feels perfect. It becomes so easy to sail right through the day. It's when things take a turn for the worse we find out who we are. That's when what we're made of comes into play.
Through the hard times I've faced I learned that whenever you find yourself face to face with make or break moments it's imperative to find the good. By looking for the good in any bad situation, you'll not only overcome the problem, you'll also discover the opportunity tucked away in each adversity you face.
Even among all the negative there is still positive patiently waiting around the corner to greet you with open arms. You just have to find it. It honestly took me a while, but I've come to terms with the fact that life isn't perfect, and these battles that we face are what make us stronger.
God blessed me with the opportunity to help make other people happy, and that warms my heart and brings a smile to my own face. I've accepted that there are things I can't change and that I just have to make the best of what I have. And I'm happy to say that I've grown as a person. I've learned that I want to be the sunshine in others people's lives and that is what I fully intend to do. Always keep it positive even when the situation seems hopeless.
I've learned that there is always a silver lining, even in our most desperate moments. No matter how dire things have become, no matter how much uncertainty is swirling all around, there's always a way out. There's always a shining light to guide you through your deepest, darkest, most desolate days. You've just got to look.
It's important to find that light -- and follow it -- and only then will you find your way.
So find the dimmed light and help it shine brightly. Bring joy to other people's lives as well as your own. Enjoy all the simple moments in life, for there's happiness in every situation. You are the only one in charge of your happiness; no one else can control it. And don't forget to look for your silver lining; the rain can't last forever.
The bottom line: The sun always shines, even after the darkest of days.