Dear “friend”,

First off I want to say, it’s not me, it’s you. I have spent all these years of our friendship believing maybe it was just me, I was difficult, and annoying, and stupid, or maybe this was just how our friendship was, full of ups and downs. I now realize I am not the problem in this friendship- it’s you.

More times than one you have made me feel stupid like I am below you and know nothing, everything I say is wrong because you are always right. While you are smart, you are also very ignorant. You don’t know everything, and neither do I, but is it really so hard to admit someone else may know something you don’t? Or to take another's perspective and opinion into consideration and respect it instead of shutting it down? Part of a good, healthy friendship is supporting each other and helping each other grow, not shutting the other down and making them feel less than. I don’t like the way you fill me with hate and anger. Your constant negativity is a downer and I no longer want to be dragged down into that pit of despair with you. I found myself being pulled into the same negative outlook that I have always loathed about you, my feelings of happiness turned to feelings of sadness, and I will not allow it to happen any longer. I choose to be happy and positive in life and I want friends who will build that up, not tear it apart. When I am in a good mood, or happy about something that I have done or am doing more times than not you find a way to bring me down and bring a negative spin upon my happiness. If this is the way you choose to live your life, you will have to do it without me.

There have been so many times throughout the course of our friendship I have wanted to walk away- but I didn’t. I have constantly given you the benefit of the doubt. Maybe you’ve had a bad day, or there are things causing you stress and you were just letting it out. I tried to be a good, understanding friend but the problem is, it happens too often and, regardless of the reason, I can’t stick around through it any longer. Now I am not saying our friendship has been all bad, because it hasn’t. There have been plenty of times of fun and laughter, we were real friends and we did fun things. But the negativity out ways these times and I cannot stick around only for those few brief moments of fun.

So old friend, I want to end by saying thank you. Thank you for showing me that I deserve better. Thank you for showing me the things I now know I need to stay away from. I deserve friends that value and support me, who fill me with love and joy, not anger and negativity. Without you, I may have never discovered my true friends. I also want to say I forgive you. I hope you find your way one day, when reality hits and you realize the way you treat your “friends” is only going to dig you deeper into that hole of negativity and despair, and maybe then we can be friends again, but until then understand I cannot continue to be dragged along in this toxic friendship.

The best of luck,

Your friend. xo