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A Break Up (As Told By Will Ferrell)

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A Break Up (As Told By Will Ferrell)

You sense it coming...a month or two before the break up you can feel the relationship slowly falling apart.


You are not communicating as well, and your lovey-dovey, romantic moments are dwindling. Fights are more frequent, and friends become worried about your well-being.


It happens. You receive the "we need to talk" phone call (or text, these days) followed by a dreadful, awkward conversation on the uncomfortable couch that ends in tears.



The two of you pretend like you are ending the relationship on a civil note, but you know that will never be the case. You will always have some type of romantic feelings which will ensure that you two can never be friends.


You go home and continue to be upset for a while. Colors seem dull, people seem boring (or overly concerned with your situation), and the whole world feels like it's coming to an end. You either indulge in terrible food and watery beer or eat nothing at all and ignore any situations that may, in the slightest bit, remind you of your ex.


After a while, things start to calm down. You start being able to go out in public and converse with other human beings.


That is, until the alcohol is pulled out, and then it is just a waiting game to see when the emotion will rear its ugly head.


But then suddenly, people stop talking about what happened. You can go to parties without being asked "where is (insert name here)?" You start pretending to be the happy and bubbly person you were before, so as not to annoy people with your love problems.


You get set up on multiple dates... all of which end badly because he or she does not even come close to being as cool as your ex was (or as attractive).


Finally, another human comes along that seems to be able to put words together to make a coherent, interesting sentence. You two hit it off and for a couple moments, the thoughts of your ex do not seem so painful.

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