It has taken me years. Years of avoiding mirrors. Years of dodging my reflection in store windows. Countless plans that I suddenly couldn't make because I hated the way my body looked that day. Maybe it was triggered by the cellulite peeking its way out of my shorts. Or maybe it was the stretch mark that lingered an inch or two below my sleeve. But today I have grown proud of the marks and lines that used to compromise my voice.
There's this unrealistic expectation that you will one day wake up and love your body. You'll scream it from roof tops and from the peaks of the tallest mountains. But in reality, there are going to be days where you wake up and your mirror seems like your worst enemy. But there will also be days where you'll finally appreciate your body and the things that it does for you. My advice? Find a balance.
Accept that there will be good days and bad days.
Think of self love/self acceptance as a map that will lead you to your dream destination. On every road trip, there are winding roads and rocky paths. There will be tears along side laughter. You may get a few more wrinkles or laugh lines. It's an emotional journey. But if you can learn to love your body and power through the bad days, everything will be worth it.
On my worst days, the days where I don't want to leave my house due to my insecurities, I remind myself of the wonders of my body. My body has carried me through every single day of my life. It has hiked up waterfalls. It has overcome illnesses. Its had broken bones and torn muscles.
I remind myself that stretch marks are not the end of the world even though they may feel like it. I remind myself that my weight doesn't determine my beauty or how desirable I am. I remind myself that my weight doesn't determine how healthy I am. I remind myself that the fat on my stomach doesn't make me less of a human being. I remind myself that I am in fact still human. With every line that marks my body, with every inch around my waist, and with every extra pound, I am still beautiful. Despite what others may feel about my body and the imperfections that call it home, I am beautiful.
Even on the best days, your insecurities may still eat you up. But never let them get in the way of your life. Don't deny yourself the right to buy a new shirt, to hangout with friends, or eat a cupcake. Don't let them compromise your voice. Instead, use them to find your voice.
