Blue lace falls from my face

Even as a woman, I am mean to feel my emotions with a dainty graceful wonder.

How does one deal with pain? Never mind the Pinterest boards with the words "Self-Care" lit up in bright colors, how does one deal with pain?

Music, drowns me in my thoughts.

Reading, my attention is somewhere else.

Going for a walk, my attention and energy are in hiding together.

I remain as poised and calm as can be.

The hysterical damsel in distress is accepted, even laughed at sometimes, the depressed bedridden woman is not. Thoughts slither their way into my head when I close my eyes.

I must make myself feel smaller

I don't want to be too emotional.

I don't want to seem crazy or irrational

I don't feel like hiding my thoughts anymore.

Not for your or anyone else's benefit.

My anxiety thoughts deserve a voice, without judgement of others.

I rip the blue lace off my skin, rusted armor I have fused to my body.

I begin my rise into a life-sized warrior, unafraid.