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Health and Wellness

11 Inevitable Stages of Blood Tests

Blood work sucks

Brianna Siciliano

Dec 26, 2016

Drew University

YouTube

Blood tests are not fun. No one enjoys getting blood drawn, absolutely no one. From the moment you step into the lab to get your blood work drawn to the moment you leave, the experience is boring, annoying, irritating, and/or painful. Sometimes it's even embarassing. We've all been there and lived through these struggles, some more often than others, and we can relate to similar stages and feelings like:

1. The long, never ending wait before being called to the information desk.

Unless you have an appointment, it can take hours to be called. Okay, maybe not hours...but definitely half-hours.

2. The hunger struggle is real.

Why do we need to fast for so many of the tests? If I'm fasting, I don't want to wait in a room with all these people.

3. Pee-shyness.

When you're told you have to pee in a cup, but you have pee-shyness. Yes, pee-shyness is a real thing, and it's serious. Don't tell me to pee before I can be called in for my blood work. I drank four bottles of water before coming here, but once you tell me I need to pee, I just can't do it.

4. Realizing that no amount of water is enough to get the blood to come out of your veins.

Some people have the gift of veins that give blood, but not me. My veins don't give up the goods.

5. Counting how many tubes the phlebotomist (the person who is taking your blood) grabs for you to fill.

And realizing how much of your blood is about to be drawn.

6. Seeing the needle and freaking out a little bit.

7. When it feels like your circulation is being cut off by the latex tourniquet.

8. Feeling the tiny pinch when the needle breaks into your skin and hearing the phlebotomist say "No blood is coming out."

You know what this means....you're about to be poked again.

9. When the phlebotomist can't find a vein in your arm so they have to poke veins in your hand(s).

Hands hurt sooooo badly, so much worse than the arms.

10. When your blood slows down and stops coming out but you still have tubes that need to be filled.

11. Ripping off the bandaid a few minutes after your blood is drawn and watching your bruise appear.

Yes, it sounds pathetic, but ripping off the band aid hurts. And that bruise hurts even more!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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11 Inevitable Stages of Blood Tests

Blood work sucks

1. The long, never ending wait before being called to the information desk.

2. The hunger struggle is real.

3. Pee-shyness.

4. Realizing that no amount of water is enough to get the blood to come out of your veins.

5. Counting how many tubes the phlebotomist (the person who is taking your blood) grabs for you to fill.

6. Seeing the needle and freaking out a little bit.

7. When it feels like your circulation is being cut off by the latex tourniquet.

8. Feeling the tiny pinch when the needle breaks into your skin and hearing the phlebotomist say "No blood is coming out."

9. When the phlebotomist can't find a vein in your arm so they have to poke veins in your hand(s).

10. When your blood slows down and stops coming out but you still have tubes that need to be filled.

11. Ripping off the bandaid a few minutes after your blood is drawn and watching your bruise appear.

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The struggles of having an RBF are all too real

1. People asking if you're mad at them.

2. Those people who hand out flyers don't always try to stop you.

3. Creepy guys telling you to smile.

4. "I thought you were a bitch when I first met you."

5. People telling you you'd be "so much prettier if you smiled."

6. Doing your makeup and looking great, which somehow intensifies the bitch face.

7. Regularly explaining "it's just my face."

We all go through certain stages when we have a crush, Tina just explains it better.

That moment that someone you never looked twice at suddenly makes you do a double take out of no where.

But you can't have a crush, that's outrageous. It's all in your head.

Because you don't have a crush, there's no reason to tell anyone about anything. Right?

But then they do something irresistible and you start to lose it.

Now accepting the fact you have a crush, you have to keep it under control.

Then there's the part where you tell your friends who will claim they called it.

They'll be excited and cheer you on. That's until they realize that your crush is all you'll be talking about.

Your obsession has become so bad, that your Facebook stalking is getting out of control.

But your friends will try and help move things along any way they can. That doesn't mean it will be any helpful though.

As time goes on, you start having fantasies about the two of you and it's starting to scare you a little.

You can't focus on anything because all your attention is on them and everything they do.

Anybody who comes near your crush is now an enemy, and you are willing to fight for your crush.

When you see them, you act like an idiot. Trying to hide your feelings may not be as discrete as you think.

Keeping your feelings inside will start to be harder and harder until you can't keep it inside anymore.

Who knows, maybe it will work out? Take a chance.

Everybody hurts sometimes.

May the odds be ever in your favor.

What about those of us who don't do it all in four years?

1. You feel like an elder.

2. You may feel lonely.

3. Senioritis is more real than ever.

4. You may feel a little down sometimes.

5. Fear of missing out won't be as real.

6. You are a college pro.

7. You'll have more free time.

8. You're happy you're still in school.

9. You feel like a guru.

10. You continue to grow.

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