My name is Nathan Vinson. I was born and raised in Tallahassee, FL, and am a proud graduate of Lincoln High School. I'm now entering into my second year at Florida A&M University on a full academic scholarship where I'm majoring in Broadcast Journalism and double minoring in Writing and Music Industry. I'm heavily involved on both my school's campus and in my local church, as well as in the Tallahassee community. I have big dreams of being a television drama screenwriter and talk show host in the hopes of impacting the global community in a positive way.
But during a routine traffic stop, I could be shot and killed by a police officer, all because of the color of my skin.
Welcome to my life, as a black man in America.
Since 1619, when the first African slaves were brought to America, the value of my life has been devalued. And judging by the outright murders of both Alton Sterling and Philando Castile, it seems like much hasn't changed.
Seeing the videos was almost too much for me. I had to tell myself that it wasn't a TV show; it's real life. My life.
It could've been my neighbor. Once, it was almost my brother.
It could've been me.
The fact that this is my reality is only the half; the other half? The hatred and ignorance that seeps from my social media timelines.
People I went to high school with, people I considered friends of mine, have the audacity to say it's not a race issue.
There's ALWAYS been a race issue in this country.
I say Black Lives Matter, they say All Lives Matter...as if it's hard to understand why I'm saying 'Black Lives Matter' in the first place.
Y'ALL UNDERSTAND.
How am I supposed to feel?
Angry? Disappointed? Fearful? Anxious? Frustrated. Vengeful? Helpless?
How do you process wrongful death, after wrongful death, after wrongful death, followed by a slew of not guilty verdicts?
You can't. It's impossible.
I can feel the tears forming in my eyes as I type these very words because I know God has a great plan for my life and I just want to graduate, and chase my dreams, and get married, and have beautiful children and see them have children of their own and I might not be able to experience any of this all because I'm a black man in America.
"But Nathan, you're not like, a bad person or anything like that."
I wish Tamir Rice had a chance to tell the police that. Or Trayvon Martin. Or Alton Sterling. Or Freddie Gray. Or Mike Brown. Or Eric Garner. Or any black man that's been profiled based on the pigmentation of their skin.
We're worth more than a 'dab' and a 'nae nae'. We're worth more than our genitalia. We're worth more than a Super Bowl Sunday or an NBA final. We're worth more than a "Metro Boomin want some more" or a "We got London on the track".
We're living, breathing people with goals, aspirations, and dreams. We just want a fair and equal chance. At life.
But, we're black men in America.