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100 Iconic 'Gilmore Girls' Quotes That Super Cool People Have Memorized

"I'm attracted to pie. It doesn't mean I feel the need to date pie." - Lorelai Gilmore

hannah kudler

Oct 18, 2023

Pennsylvania State University

27807

Two women side by side smiling on Gilmore Girls

https://www.instagram.com/p/BlDJ08jgQL1/

Rory and Lorelai Gilmore. The mother-daughter relationship that's been making everyone jealous since the early 2000s. "Gilmore Girls" finished with 7 seasons, not including the additional 4 episodes set nearly a decade after the finale. The OG fans have watched this at least 2 times through on Netflix, and they have so many Gilmore Girls quotes memorized.

Through the years, we've been through so much with these characters. Lorelai going back and forth between Luke and Christopher, Rory figuring out her emotions, and so much more. Stars Hollow is the storybook town we all wish we could live in.

I have watched this show on repeat for so long. These 100 quotes are, in my opinion, the best throughout the entire series.

1. “No men. Just lots and lots of Chinese food.” - Paris Geller

Food in bowls and on plats with people scooping it up with chop stix

plate of noodlesPhoto by Debbie Tea on Unsplash

2. “If you’re going to throw your life away, he’d better have a motorcycle.” - Lorelai Gilmore

3. “I’m gonna have to quit drinking coffee, and I love coffee!” - Rory Gilmore

4. “I’m attracted to pie. It doesn’t mean I feel the need to date pie.” - Lorelai Gilmore

5. “People can live for a hundred years without a living a minute.” - Logan Huntzberger

grayscale photo of closed-eyes womanPhoto by Danie Franco on Unsplash

my mom just came to America from Nigeria. she makes jewelry so i wanted to capture her with some of her work on

African woman with colorful headwrap and jewelary

woman wearing black and multicolored turbandPhoto by Ayo Ogunseinde on Unsplash

6. “I’m afraid once your heart is involved, it all comes out in moron.” - Lorelai Gilmore

7. “People are particularly stupid today.” - Michel Gerard

8. "I can be flexible, as long as everything is exactly the way I want." - Lorelai Gilmore

9. "Think how dull your life would be without me." - Jess Mariano

10. "You jump, I jump, Jack!" - Rory Gilmore

11. "Life's short, talk fast." - Lorelai Gilmore

12. "And if eating cake is wrong, I don't wanna be right." - Lorelai Gilmore

Small child sitting on a high chair with cake on their face and hands

boy sitting on blue highchairPhoto by Chris Benson on Unsplash

13. "I cannot do this alone, I need my mommy and I don't care who knows it." - Rory Gilmore

14. "You have to sleep, it's what keeps you pretty." - Lorelai Gilmore

15. "It's times like these you realize what is 'truly' important in your life. I'm so glad I had all that sex." - Miss Patty

16. "In Omnia Paratus" - Life and Death Brigade

17. "Nothing says coffee like 6 in the morning." - Lorelai Gilmore

18. "I left behind a glass slipper, and a business card, in case the prince is really dumb." - Lorelai Gilmore

19. "Last Friday, two guys were tossing a ball and on guy nailed the other right in the face. It was a mess. Blood everywhere, the nurse came out, the place was in chaos, his girlfriend was freaking out. And you just sat there and read. You never even looked up. I thought 'I've never seen anyone read so intensely before in my entire life. I have to meet that girl.'" - Dean Forester

20. "Hi Daddy. OK, I know this is bad, and I know this probably brings back all the horrible aspects of my childhood life for you. But I am begging you, please, please do not make me go back down there because that guy is boring." - Lorelai Gilmore

21. "Solidarity, sister." - Lorelai Gilmore

22. "Man, she's not shipping off to 'Nam." - Jess Mariano

23. "Ladies and gentlemen, the drama king and queen of Connecticut." - Lorelai Gilmore

24. "This town is like one big outpatient mental institution." - Christopher Hayden

25. "Come here, You've got some dirt on your forehead. I'm sorry. It's the sign of the devil. My mistake." - Lorelai Gilmore

26. "Cranking Metallica. If that's some sort of drug reference, it isn't funny." - Richard Gilmore

27. "My God, those are good genes." - Finn

28. "Rory Gilmore, you should be ashamed of yourself. Toying with these boys like this. They used to have pride. They used to have dignity. They used to have balls. Damn it, Gilmore, give them back their balls." - Finn

29. "You really did only like me for my looks, huh?" - Logan Huntzberger

30. "Your sense of humor rears its ugly head at the oddest of times, Richard." - Emily Gilmore

31. "My taste now is not that different from an 8-year-old." - Lorelai Gilmore

32. "You have to tell me why we're committing a felony before we do it." - Logan Huntzberger

33. "Always safer to know which direction the tornado's coming from." - Luke Danes

Tornado in the distance of a street and houses

Photo by NOAA on Unsplash

island near tornado

Photo by Espen Bierud on Unsplash

34. "I'm so hot I may hit on myself tonight." - Sookie St. James

35. "Emily Gilmore, you are one classy broad." - Lorelai Gilmore

36. "I am going to go insane. If you don't help me, I'll take you with me." - Emily Gilmore

37. "Basket. Basket maker. Guy who didn't bring enough money." - Jess Mariano

38. "Who else here had eight shots of tequila? Anybody? Hands." - Lorelai Gilmore

39. "I find your mother completely fascinating." - Louise Grant

40. "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me where we can find the best Antiques?" "At your house, I'd guess." - Old ladies and Michel Gerard

41. "I wanna get the healthy glow of someone who consistently goes to the gym, without having to go to the gym of course." - Kirk

42. "That's ridiculous. Who's going to help her get into Harvard?" "Reese Witherspoon." - Richard and Lorelai Gilmore

43. "My mother never gave me any idea that I couldn't do whatever I wanted to do or be, whomever I wanted to be. As she guided me through these incredible 18 years, I don't know if she ever realized that the person I most wanted to be was her." - Rory Gilmore

44. "I think I'm going to give birth out of boredom." - Sookie St. James

45. "I don't like Mondays, but unfortunately they come around eventually." - Lorelai Gilmore

46. "The best thing about it was she'd tell me constantly. My first sentence was 'Big head want dolly'." - Lorelai Gilmore

47. "Sorry. Independence Inn. Major Disappointment speaking." - Lorelai Gilmore

48. "Fresh coffee will be ready in a minute, unless you want to just roll up a dollar bill and go nuts." - Luke Danes

49. "Well, then buy me a boa and drive me to Reno because I am open or business." - Emily Gilmore

50. "No, it's National Baptism Day. Tie your tubes, idiot." - Paris Geller

51. "Oy with the poodles already!" - Lorelai and Rory Gilmore

52. "God that's terrible. It's like drinking a My Little Pony." - Luke Danes

53. "I have no words. Oh no, wait. I found some. Jerk, ass, arrogant, inconsiderate, mindless, frat boy, low-life, buttface miscreant." - Rory Gilmore

54. "So not only did you go to a cop-raided party, but you started the raid? This fence is broken and this crap is on the ground because of you. 'Did you ever know that you're my hero'." - Lorelai Gilmore

55. "You, Logan Huntzberger, are a two-bit, spoiled waste of a trust fund. You offer nothing to women or the world in general. If you were to disappear from the face of the Earth tomorrow, the only person that would miss you is your Porsche dealer." - Paris Geller

56. "So I spent a night in jail. Big deal. So did Martin Luther King." - Rory Gilmore

57. "Only prostitutes have two glasses of wine at lunch." - Richard Gilmore

58. "A little nervous breakdown can really work wonders for a girl." - Rory Gilmore

59. "I hate when I'm an idiot and don't know it. I like to be aware of my idiocy. To revel in it, take pictures. We've missed a prime Christmas card opportunity." - Lorelai Gilmore

60. "Sure, we're girls, so we could only be arguing about a boy, right? Sexist, white-haired..." - Paris Geller

61. "Everyday that you breathe, you make my life harder." - Michel Gerard

62. "If all else fails, you can marry rich." - Rory Gilmore

63. "You're full of hate and loathing and I love it." - Lorelai Gilmore

64. "Yeah, I'm fine. I'm great. It's a big, fat, happy sunshine day for me." - Luke Danes

65. "I can't date. I'm not genetically set up for it." - Paris Geller

66. "I just don't want to be that kind of girl. The kind of girl who just falls apart because she doesn't have a boyfriend." - Rory Gilmore

67. "Who cares if I'm pretty if I fail my finals?!" - Rory Gilmore

68. "Everything's magical when it snows. Everything looks pretty." - Lorelai Gilmore

69. "Do you yahoo?" - Jess Mariano

70. "You do know that if you weren't pretty you would've gotten the crap kicked out of you everyday of your life." - Lorelai Gilmore

71. "Eternal damnation is what I'm risking for my rock and roll." - Lane Kim

72. "You have so many years of screw-ups ahead of you." - Lorelai Gilmore

73. "At least she had a husband to kill." - Emily Gilmore

74. "I smell snow!" - Lorelai Gilmore

75. "It's like my life isn't even real to me unless you're there, and you're in it, and I'm sharing it with you." - Luke Danes

76. "I don't need to do anything but be right here with you." - Logan Huntzberger

77. "I love it when I talk and no one listens. Makes me think of home." - Lorelai Gilmore

78. "Sleep when you're dead." - Paris Geller

79. "I hate having a cold. It's bad enough being sick, but anyone could have a cold. I'd like to have a good illness. Something different, impressive. Just once I'd like to be able to say, 'Yeah, I'm not feeling good; my leg is haunted'." - Lorelai Gilmore

80. "I should hate you, not miss you. Make me hate you!" "Uhhhh... Go, Hitler." - Rory and Lorelai Gilmore

81. "I don't hate you. Though I did imagine 20 ways to remove your head from your body." - Lorelai Gilmore

82. "Don't take this personally, but get out." - Rory Gilmore

83. "That...you were the greatest boyfriend alive. That as much as I wish we'd met when I was older and more mature, if I hadn't had you with me then, I wouldn't be the person I am today." - Rory Gilmore

84. "No. It's a hologram. Lifelike, isn't it?" - Emily Gilmore

85. "You sound distracted. Did something cute just walk by?" - Lorelai Gilmore

86. "Violent pencil-tossing usually signals a need for pie." - Luke Danes

87. "People don't realize it, but it takes years of training to eat the way we do." - Lorelai Gilmore

Table with bowls of different food inside

variety of cooked foodPhoto by Gor Davtyan on Unsplash

88. "Boys don't like funny girls." - Mrs. Kim

89. "You can trust nothing and no one, ever." - Michel Gerard

90. "He works at the firm of Dewey, Cheatham, and Howe." - Luke Danes

91. "I've already gone through the five sages of grieving. Denial, anger...I don't remember these two, but they were served on the rocks with salt!" - Sookie St. James

92. "I... And the chop flew, so I lunged. And the floor slipped, and then... And I just... Flip, you know?" - Sookie St. James

93. "By the way, that was some half-assed kiss you two had." - Babette Dell

94. "My brain is a while jungle full of scary gibberish." - Lorelai Gilmore

95. "I was kind of a target. I used to wear a cape to school." - Kirk

96. "Then let it remove the tar from our souls." - Paris Geller

97. "I just want you to remember three things while you're sitting up there. I love you. You're the greatest kid in the world. And you're in a skirt, keep your knees closed." - Lorelai Gilmore

98. "I don't want to talk to anybody else. I don't like anybody else." - Jess Mariano

99. "I'll put some fruit on my head and join a conga line." - Michel Gerard

100. "Lorelai Gilmore. Disappointing mothers since 1968." - Lorelai Gilmore

Old woman with glasses and a hat on that is angry

woman in white top wearing eyeglassesPhoto by RepentAnd SeekChristJesus on Unsplash

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