Dear Best Friend,
I know it has become an extremely overused and cliched phrase, but I mean it when I say that you’re my person. You’re the cookoo to my cocoa puffs, the deodorant to my armpit, and the best human I know. I don’t remember when we went from acquaintances to friends and friends to best friends, but I do know that I would have been lost without you over the last few years. Whether I needed your advice on an outfit or a major life decision, you have always been honest with me. We’ve been through hell and back together, and you’ve been my rock through both the good and the bad. You know all the things I hate about myself, my quirks, and even my darkest secrets, but you never judge. You’re one of the only people I feel comfortable being myself around, and I’m lucky to have someone in my life who is just as goofy and twisted as I am.
And while our families may be right when they say that we spend way too much time together, there’s no one else I’d rather hang out and do nothing with. I know I must annoy the crap out of you with my horrible singing and the way I wear your clothes more often than I wear my own, but you never show it. You laugh at my horrendous covers of popular songs and offer me shorts you know you’ll never get back because that’s the kind of person you are. You’re a total goon, but you’re also generous and see the best in everyone but yourself. You’re prone to falling, but you always get back up (even when you want to die of embarrassment). You have a sense of fashion that I would kill to possess, and a wicked sense of humor that cracks me up on a daily basis. You’re incredibly sarcastic, you love all things neon, you own way too many pairs of tennis shoes, and you hate that I call your "sneakers" tennis shoes (I will never stop). You love the Minions so much that you dragged me to see the new Minion movie with you, and I tried not to smile the entire time because you were so happy to be there. And it's sad but true that strangers assume that we're either a couple or sisters, and we're always the seventh and eighth wheels at your family events.
But the best part about our relationship is knowing that even if we're separated by a hundred miles or don't see each other for weeks at a time, we're always going to be best friends. Sometimes we want to punch each other in the face, but that's OK. I forgave you the last time you accidentally punched me in the face, and I'll forgive you if you ever decide to do it on purpose. And if you asked me to rob a bank or sell my kidney on the black market because you needed some extra cash to make a real life Minion, I would do it. Because I love you, and that's what best friends are for. So thank you for being you, and thanks to the universe for bringing us two psychopaths together.
Love,
Your Best Friend