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17 Quotes From 'Big Mouth' That Will Make You Blamo In Your Pants

It's what America wants.

Ellie

Apr 05, 2019

The State University of New York at Stony Brook

112554

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'Big Mouth' is the best show that describes the experiences of seventh graders going through puberty. Not only is it accurate (minus all the monsters popping up and talking pillows), it is one of the funniest shows I have seen in a long time. There are so many great quotes from the show that show why season two had 100% on Rotten Tomatoes, but here are some of my favorites.

1. "You really want to get your tongue underneath hers, too. Yeah, you want to get in there like a Claritin to just dissolve."

I mean, what better kissing advice can there be?

2. "Hey man, I got a medical emergency so I gotta bounce. Jack off twice and page me in the morning."

A teenage boy's dream homework assignment.

3. "It's not for me, but people will like it. It's Starbucks. It's what America wants."

When people post their whole life on social media...

4. "You lean your head back, arch your crotch in the air and say, 'Dinner is served.'"

The only way to ask for oral. No head-pushing!

5. "The mons pubis? Oh, it's the welcome mat at the pleasure palace."

Learned something new about my body.

6. "They're saying I'm a serial killer, but I'm just a chronic masturbater."

Just a small misunderstanding.

7. "I live balls out and I give zero fucks."

Jay, stop quoting your dad's law commericals.

8. "Love dies, let's bury the body together."

Guy Bilzerian plays both sides of the coin.

9. "All I wanted was a blow job at a high school party, is that such a crime?"

Yeah, actually, if you do that. But out of context, it sounds funny.

10. "Listen to me! You want to shoplift lipstick, you want to listen to Lana Del Rey on repeat while you cut up all your t-shirts. You want to scream at your mother and then laugh at her tears!"

We all had our rebellious phase. Luckily Lana outlasted it all.

11. "Why do you smell so good?" "Because I don't use deodorant and I only take bhubble bayths"

The only way to stay fresh. Self-care at its finest.

12. "I'm what's known in the medical community as a man baby."

Everyone's favorite coach Steve.

13. "The problem with your sink is that I have no idea how to fix it."

That may not be the only problem with it.

14. "I'm going to do sex on a lady, and a lady is going to do sex on me."

Possibly the best in-show song ever.

15. "Let's rub fronts."

Putting pressure on the mons pubis to really set the mood.

16. "Eleanor Roosevelt once said, quote, 'Do one thing every day that scares you,' closed quote, and I think this red bra scares both of us."

Using Eleanor Roosevelt to convince your mom to buy a nicer bra is a nice touch.

17. “Show her you like her. Kick her in the shins."

The worst advice from your favorite hormone monster. Just kidding, Connie is the best.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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17 Quotes From 'Big Mouth' That Will Make You Blamo In Your Pants

It's what America wants.

In This Article:

1. "You really want to get your tongue underneath hers, too. Yeah, you want to get in there like a Claritin to just dissolve."

2. "Hey man, I got a medical emergency so I gotta bounce. Jack off twice and page me in the morning."

3. "It's not for me, but people will like it. It's Starbucks. It's what America wants."

4. "You lean your head back, arch your crotch in the air and say, 'Dinner is served.'"

5. "The mons pubis? Oh, it's the welcome mat at the pleasure palace."

6. "They're saying I'm a serial killer, but I'm just a chronic masturbater."

7. "I live balls out and I give zero fucks."

8. "Love dies, let's bury the body together."

9. "All I wanted was a blow job at a high school party, is that such a crime?"

10. "Listen to me! You want to shoplift lipstick, you want to listen to Lana Del Rey on repeat while you cut up all your t-shirts. You want to scream at your mother and then laugh at her tears!"

11. "Why do you smell so good?" "Because I don't use deodorant and I only take bhubble bayths"

12. "I'm what's known in the medical community as a man baby."

13. "The problem with your sink is that I have no idea how to fix it."

14. "I'm going to do sex on a lady, and a lady is going to do sex on me."

15. "Let's rub fronts."

16. "Eleanor Roosevelt once said, quote, 'Do one thing every day that scares you,' closed quote, and I think this red bra scares both of us."

17. “Show her you like her. Kick her in the shins."

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This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

1. When it's December 1 and you have seven things due, three exams, and haven't slept in three days.

2. So you stress.

3. And cry.

4. Then call your mom to cry some more.

5. After the pep talk, you feel determined to get everything done.

6. But, now you're tired.

7. And really hungry.

8. Suddenly, it's 2 a.m. and you have only written three sentences and your paper is due in the morning.

9. You've made it to Friday... somehow.

10. Then Sunday hits and you find yourself back at the Lib.

11. So you cry some more.

12. But, you fight through the tears to get everything done because you're determined.

13. In the end, you feel on top of the world because you made it through the last week of class alive.

14. But, now it's finals week so good luck.

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