We've all been there. All of a sudden we went from being innocent teenagers to adults. Now everyone around you has been in a relationship, is getting out of one, living together, getting engaged and then married. Where do you fit into all of this chaos? You don't. You're just a single college student. And that's okay.
With Valentine's Day coming up, some college men and women are noticing that they are one of the few people who is not focused on having a partner. At first, reading this you'd think "oh no, another sob story about relationships." Nope, you're wrong. I'm here to tell you that it's not only okay, it's great! Now, let me explain why.
For one, your college years are about growing and discovering who you want to be and how you can achieve it. You're learning new things every day and you are absorbing them. Personally, I am a Journalism major and English minor. Every day I'm learning new ways to write and how that is going to apply to my dream career. I'm thinking about how to build my portfolio and become a better writer. That's where my focus is at and finishing college of course.
Because college is about finding yourself, relationships can be pointless distractions. You're thinking "Why hasn't he/she/they called me?" Instead of "How can I use my free time to build my future?" Sometimes people can't help it; they are obsessing over a person and that is getting in the way of their success.
Don't get me wrong though, you CAN be in a relationship and still focus, but the matter of it is, as I've heard from close ones, once you're in a serious relationship it becomes a big part of your life. College years and being in your 20s is the time to invent what kind of future you want and to have fun.
By having fun, I mean going out and spending time with friends, traveling to wherever you want when you have the funds, and working so you can do all of these things. By no means is it easy to find a job or find people to travel with, but that is the adult life. You're learning what kind of friendships you want to build and keep. You are learning what your likes and interests are. You- it is all about you.
Your entire life up until you are in a relationship you don't really owe anyone an explanation and your responsibilities are probably bills, working, and school. You don't have kids yet or a husband/wife/partner. You are FREE. Sometimes people feel trapped in relationships, especially long distance ones, where people tend to get insecure about their partner cheating, unless there is a huge foundation of trust. Worrying about what your partner may or may not be doing when they are not with you is very stressful.
Another thing, social media is where relationships are glorified. You see all the cute pictures of flowers they got, or cute selfies, and vacation pictures. You don't see the fights, the resentment, the stress. You can't learn anything about relationships from social media. AND with social media as well, it is VERY easy to cheat and find out about cheating.
The point is although relationships may be the end goal if someday you want to get married, it's okay if it is not currently your main focus. The benefits include being less stressed, and learning to love yourself, something no one can really help you do. Single, or not, enjoy every day of your life loving the people you already do love: your best friend, your family, your pets- whatever. Just make sure the main end goal of today is happiness, regardless of what everyone else is doing or who they are dating.
