There's a saying that goes, "we're often harshest to the people we love the most." I can think of more than a few times that I have proven this true. Is this why our most explosive arguments are with our spouses, family members and closest friends? In reflecting on this concept, it's become apparent to me how tragic this is. That we could become the most angry and the most viscous with the people we know the most intimately. We know their stories. We know the struggles and pain that made them who they are. But we use that knowledge as ammunition to fight with them, instead of extending grace.
There's a point in relationships when you will be let down. It's a fact. We're all human. There certainly is a line between mistakes and deal breakers. But at what point do we think about someone's mistakes and set them as a new standard for that person? We say "oh I just know he's going to do this. He always does." We define our significant other, our family member or friends by their mistakes. Is this believing the best in them? Absolutely not. It's taking a low moment of theirs and plastering it on a wall of shame for everyone to see.
It sounds so harsh, but I really do think we sometimes believe the worst in the people we love the most. The people we have spent the most time trying to understand. The people we put so much effort to love. All the deep conversations and the secrets shared, we keep it all in our back pockets just to be the ones who label them as their mistakes.
I honestly think we do this in hopes that we will "be right." We would rather win than see the person we love grow from their mistakes. The older I get the more I realize that life is more about loving and less about winning. It calls for a self-reflection. Are we loving the ones we're closest to? Or are we waiting for them to slip up? Could it be possible that this time they will impress us? Imagine what could happen.