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I Believe In The Future Me Because Of How Much I've Already Grown

Who I was in the past is proud of who I am now.

Brenda Argueta

Oct 01, 2018

University of Central Florida

104

I Believe In The Future Me Because Of How Much I've Already Grown

https://pixabay.com/en/woman-girl-freedom-happy-sun-591576/

I'm always being hard on myself. I am so bad at wanting to see progress right away whether it's with school, work, or just overall how my life is going. And when I don't, I get so frustrated with myself. Others seem to have this whole life thing down, but here I am just not at the same pace.

But then I realize all I've been through and where I am today. I'm a freakin' college student who literally doesn't have to worry about a dime. I am able to go to school and I'm grateful for it because I've seen my parents struggle to get their educations. I've climbed out of what felt like the dark because of people who care for me and because I reached out for help.

I didn't have the best time growing up. I had two homes and both had their downs. If one place was miserable, the other was a solace. And each home didn't stay the same. I dreamt of the day I'd be able to be off on my own and have the space I needed away from home.

So when I'm feeling beaten by everything, I'll remember where I've been and what I came from. When I think of the person I'll be in five to 10 years, I imagine I'll be the same. I'll remember the days I was in college and the challenges I faced that felt overbearing were really small in nature. I'll remember the steps I took to pay attention and heal the wounds life had given me that really needed stitches even though I kept using band-aids. I'll remember the days I was worried about the way people felt about me and if I was hurting their feelings. I'll also probably remember how stupid that is because I don't even remember their names.

I hope the person I'll be in the future remembers what it was like to be a young adult. I hope she has a job she is happy with and remembers the day she thought she would never be happy working at a job in a male-dominated world. I hope she is confident in herself and doesn't give power to those who don't deserve it.

And this is what I believe: I believe she'll be all these things and more because of what we've been through and what we learned along the way. I believe we are never the same as the person we were yesterday and that everything serves as a lesson for us.

I believe in future me.

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I Believe In The Future Me Because Of How Much I've Already Grown

Who I was in the past is proud of who I am now.

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The struggles of having an RBF are all too real

1. People asking if you're mad at them.

2. Those people who hand out flyers don't always try to stop you.

3. Creepy guys telling you to smile.

4. "I thought you were a bitch when I first met you."

5. People telling you you'd be "so much prettier if you smiled."

6. Doing your makeup and looking great, which somehow intensifies the bitch face.

7. Regularly explaining "it's just my face."

We all go through certain stages when we have a crush, Tina just explains it better.

That moment that someone you never looked twice at suddenly makes you do a double take out of no where.

But you can't have a crush, that's outrageous. It's all in your head.

Because you don't have a crush, there's no reason to tell anyone about anything. Right?

But then they do something irresistible and you start to lose it.

Now accepting the fact you have a crush, you have to keep it under control.

Then there's the part where you tell your friends who will claim they called it.

They'll be excited and cheer you on. That's until they realize that your crush is all you'll be talking about.

Your obsession has become so bad, that your Facebook stalking is getting out of control.

But your friends will try and help move things along any way they can. That doesn't mean it will be any helpful though.

As time goes on, you start having fantasies about the two of you and it's starting to scare you a little.

You can't focus on anything because all your attention is on them and everything they do.

Anybody who comes near your crush is now an enemy, and you are willing to fight for your crush.

When you see them, you act like an idiot. Trying to hide your feelings may not be as discrete as you think.

Keeping your feelings inside will start to be harder and harder until you can't keep it inside anymore.

Who knows, maybe it will work out? Take a chance.

Everybody hurts sometimes.

May the odds be ever in your favor.

What about those of us who don't do it all in four years?

1. You feel like an elder.

2. You may feel lonely.

3. Senioritis is more real than ever.

4. You may feel a little down sometimes.

5. Fear of missing out won't be as real.

6. You are a college pro.

7. You'll have more free time.

8. You're happy you're still in school.

9. You feel like a guru.

10. You continue to grow.

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