I believe in falling in order to find our passions. I believe in ticking pocket watches belonging to white rabbits, meaningless puzzles waiting to be solved and I believe in self-discovery in Wonderland.
I am Alice, tumbling down the rabbit hole into Wonderland. I am open-minded, fearless and always falling down. Literally. I am still finding where I belong, and am still in my own mindset of Wonderland trying to find "my thing.”
In some areas, "my thing" came easy. I always knew I wanted to be a journalist from the time I was eight years old-- creating fake newspapers and reciting news and sports broadcasts to my second grade class that nobody wanted to hear. None of this has changed, and although I have gone onto bigger things, my interest in journalism has remained consistent. I believe in some areas, "things" come naturally from when you are young, but not everything does.
When I was younger, I was involved in nearly every sport. I was naturally athletic; but I never found "my thing" that I truly enjoyed that so many people seemed to be able to find. When I began swimming, I was always just placed wherever I was needed. It takes time to find your event and for a while I just forced myself to take whatever my coach put me in with a smile. Eventually, I was taught the butterfly properly, a harder stroke that not many girls tried and mastered it. It took time, but I figured out butterfly was my event. I went on to win awards that years ago only dreamed I would. It took me years and years to find something I am particularly good at in the water, but I did.
In some cases, I still don't have "a thing" that sticks out and I am beginning to learn that is okay. I joined track in middle school. I always loved to run, and I instantly loved track. It was also a solid way for me to release all of my energy, and I came home pretty exhausted and quiet. But, there were days I did not feel that way. While I don’t really have a specific event that I focus on, I’m starting to learn that not everyone does. For now, I will start each meet checking my coach's ever-changing lists of events, take whatever is written under "Pye" with a smile and do my absolute best. I quite possibly might never find "my event", but I am learning to accept that it is just fine.
I am Alice. I am falling down the rabbit hole into Wonderland. I am curious, vulnerable and at times oblivious to the world around me. I am ready to try new things, face the inevitable horror fuming from the Red Queen that comes with life, and I am always up for a tea party where everyone belongs, no matter the occasion.
Since I have been able to understand it, I have always obsessed with this concept we call time. I need structure to function, and in the back of my head I hear the white rabbit's clock ticking away. At the same time, I know that in learning and working we are evolving, and learning and evolving takes time. This growth and development has reminded me that when it comes to people finding their strengths, gifts, and talents, the pocket watch should not be heavily monitored. I have learned that in waiting for it, I am gaining from the wait. With that, I challenge you to accept your abilities for what they are, and allow however much time you need to find where you belong.
Slow down your pocket watch, even if it means you'll be late for your very important date. Go out there and have your tea party.