Being the bigger person, holding your tongue when you've been hurt, not being the one to get involved in a fight or argument that's about you or just simply being the mature one in any given situation can be extremely difficult, no matter what age you are. We all have that natural instinct to step in and stand up for ourselves. We don't want to be walked all over, hurt, lied to, disrespected, tore down or have our character be put into question, but sometimes, unfortunately, others put us in that position. Yeah, it sucks and sometimes it's hard not to be the bigger person, but being the bigger person shows so much about your maturity, your strength and your character.
"Show respect even to people who don't deserve it; not as a reflection of their character, but as a reflection of yours." - Dave Willis
Trust me, I know the anger that can build up inside you, the frustration that some person is causing by speaking badly about you. A stranger, a friend of a friend, an ex-friend, a past significant other, a family member, a coworker, a boss, a classmate - anyone in this world can challenge your character or actions. They may post about it on social media, say something to your face, say something to one of your friends who then tells you or they may just keep it to themselves, but act differently towards you. But you have to remind yourself that in those moments when individuals speak poorly about you when you've done nothing wrong, that often is their issue. By that I mean the person may be jealous, may have their own issues and instead of handling those themselves, they are taking out their frustration on you. Their comments about you or your actions may be the outcome of some internal battle within the other person.
When outsiders see another individual speaking poorly of someone who doesn't deserve it, most people think that the person who is saying such things is immature, or "petty," and most won't think badly of you - especially if you choose to be the bigger person. Yes, sometimes we feel the need to comment back or to give them a taste of their own medicine, but what good does that do us? We just end up more aggravated by intervening. The back and forth banter doesn't solve the problem, and it just is a waste of time. Even though their comments may upset you, the only thing you can control is yourself and your own mindset. Part of maturing and growing up is knowing when it is appropriate to make comments back when people say certain things that attack or bring you down. Picking your battles, so to speak, is a skill that is learned. You start to ignore the poorly made comments about yourself and instead focus your attention on being that bigger person.
Being the bigger person shows just how mature and level-headed you are. You don't let other people bring you down or change the way you feel about yourself. You don't respond to negative comments with more negative comments; you don't tear the other individual down. Instead, you let them say what they have to say to make themselves feel better. You don't entertain the drama and negativity that they are putting out there. You go on and act unaffected by their negative words in order to overcome them. You know that individuals who put others down thrive on the fight back, and you aren't going to let them do that to you. Be true to yourself and pick yourself up when you've been put down. Be strong, be resilient, be patient, be kind and be that bigger person; it'll pay off, I promise you.
