I was in a relationship for three years up until a few weeks ago. It was an amazing relationship and I learned a great amount from it. However, being in college, the distance just got to be too much for us, and we decided to take some time apart for a bit. It has been a very difficult, confusing and weird few weeks.
Right when it happened, of course, I was devastated. How could I not be? It just randomly came up one day and then the next day.. It was all over. It is kind of crazy to think about. Being with someone you put your 100% focus on for three years and then one day that just being all over. It is a very sad thing to think about, but it can be for the best.
When I think about it, at hard as it was, I think that what we did was for the best. For anyone who is in a long distance relationship, you know it is not so easy. I mean, for some people it could be extremely easy, but that wasn't the case for me. I almost felt that I was not focusing on myself and my needs enough. We were three hours away from each other, so our communication depended on our phones and texting and facetiming. It just was not easy, I missed him all the time and found myself sad a lot of the time.
Of course I am sad and it is very heartbreaking going through a breakup. Some days are a lot easier, and other days I find myself crying in my room regretting my decision. However, when I really take the time to think about things, I know that this was the best decision for the both of us, even if it didn't seem like it.
To me, timing is big factor in relationships. We were in long distance for almost all of our relationship, and we would have been for 2-3 more years if we stayed together. We didn't end because I'm not strong enough, because I know I am strong. I did distance for almost three years, that is something that made me stronger than ever. I learned so much from it and him, and I would never go back and do anything differently. He was my first love, and my first heartbreak, and I will take those lessons with me for the future.
I do still love him so much, and I think I will for a very, very long time. We ended on really good terms, so I was able to get the closure I needed and a really nice, but extremely sad, goodbye. It gets a little bit easier every day, and I know it will take time to fully heal, but I know I will eventually get there one day. As cheesy as it is, I believe that it's true that if it is meant to be it will be. If one day we both realize how much we need each other, then we will get there. If that never happens, then that is okay.
If you are struggling in a long distance relationship, just really think about what is best for you. Not your significant other, your parents, friends, his/her friends, etc, just YOU. Think about the future and if you would want to be on your own for a little or staying with your partner. Whatever you choose will workout in the end, no matter what. If you are struggling with a breakup, just know that it will be okay. You will end up being stronger than you ever have been, and now is the time to focus on you and what makes you happy, because that is the most important thing you can do for yourself.
