I remember being in grade school and seeing the kids with glasses and thinking, "Man, it sure would be sweet to have glasses. They just make everyone look cuter!" Soon after my sister was prescribed glasses and it's safe to say the jealously of glasses wearers was definitely becoming more prevalent in my young and unencumbered life. I subsequently begged my mom to take me for a vision test.
My mother, who only took us to the doctor in serious situations (My immune system is strong AF, thanks Mom!), humored me and took me to the eye doctor. I'm not going to fact check whether or not that's the best term, mostly because I think you get the picture.
I was extremely hopeful that post-exam, the doctor would assess that I did indeed have poor vision and would be needing glasses immediately. Which is pretty funny considering you would never go to the doctor all "Please, please let it be cancer!" But I digress. What ended up happening instead, I was told my vision was perfect and that basically, I had wasted my mother's money on an unnecessary co-pay.
After that crushing defeat, I decided to embrace my perfect vision. And by embrace I mean I just spent the next 15 years bragging about it to all of the people I knew with glasses. It was a high life. Though I must admit, a desire for the accessory stuck with me, no matter how much I denied it.
All of this was true until a few weeks ago.
While driving in an unfamiliar area and desperately trying to read street signs, I realized I couldn't make out the letters until I was practically underneath the signs. I was floored. A part of me chalked it up to not enough water that day or something. Until I noticed how hard it was to read things that were only 15 feet away, whether I was driving or not.
So with the stamp of approval from my "only serious situations" mom, I went and got my eyes checked.
AND HOLY FUCK MAN. How did I not know I haven't been living in HD?! I couldn't believe how much better everything looked! Suffice to say, the little jealous kid in me was pumped.
That is until I realized how utterly annoying glasses can be. I wear sunglasses often so I thought it would be similar but, no. You have to clean them way too often, they leave stupid little marks on your nose and are way too easy to lose.
Now I know I can wear contacts, but honestly, I just feel like that's even more work than what I'm signing up for with frames.
All-in-all, I think the point of me writing this is to show that the saying is true, the grass isn't always greener. Beyond that, it's an apology to all of the people with glasses that I either envied or bragged to because I now whole-heartedly understand all of your pain.
