Being Clumsy Sucks | The Odyssey Online
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Being Clumsy Sucks

I'm the most uncoordinated person on the planet, and I'm tired of injuring or embarrassing myself.

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I don't know what it is, but for some reason, I can't manage to stay on my feet. I fall over all the time. I bump into things constantly. I'm always finding some new bruise and I usually don't know how I got it. It's ridiculous.

It wasn't always like this, though, and that bothers me. I played three sports when I was younger and I took dance classes from the time I was two years old until I was in the fifth grade. Everything was fine then. Sometime in high school, however, my coordination just vanished out of thin air.

The first semester of college, the second day after move-in, I tripped walking around my room and slammed my face into my desk. Hurt like nobody's business but didn't think it was that bad; no nose bleed, nothing. Until hours later. It was sore, so I looked in the mirror and it looked like I straight up got punched in the face. The bruising on my nose was awful. So, I had to call my mom and have her come get to Rowan, pick me up, and take me to get it checked out. Broken. *sigh*

What a great start to the semester.

About two weeks later, we had a fire drill in the middle of the night. I live on the fourth floor, and you can't use the elevators during fire drills for obvious reasons, so I went to take the stairs. As I'm going down with my roommate and my neighbors, I completely busted ass and slid down the stairs. When I got to the bottom of the staircase, my foot got caught somehow and my body propelled forward and slammed into the wall.

I got a nice cut on my hip (which wound up scarring, of course), and because I couldn't get my hands in front of my face fast enough. I made my nose, which was still trying to heal from the first incident, even worse due to my face kissing the wall.

It doesn't stop there.

Those are just two major times my incoordination has been a real issue. There are so many little things, too. I fell off my chair in class one day. It was one of those roller chairs, and I guess I miscalculated where my butt goes, but needless to say, the chair rolled out from under me and I was sprawled on the ground in a matter of seconds. That was pretty embarrassing. My friend sitting next to me laughing her head off didn't help lessen the stares and quiet giggles from everyone in the room, either.

Just the other day, I hit my head trying to get a snack from under my bed. Oh, and I ran into a pole walking back to my room from class one time.

It is worse when the weather is bad. Any cold, wet thing just doesn't get along with me.

One time, during the beginning of this semester, it snowed outside, but my classes weren't canceled, so I still had to go. I wore my snow boots and got to my class in one piece, but it was the commute back to my room that was the issue. I was walking up a little hill that led to my dorm buildings, and it was kinda icy.

I completely lost all footing and fell flat on my knee. What's worse is that the knee I landed on already has issues from countless other times I've injured myself, so it fell out from behind me when I landed and I then proceeded to slide down the hill. After that, I literally refused to go outside when it snows, and I have missed classes because of it.

Sorry Mom, but an hour and fifteen minutes of lecture is not worth probable head trauma or broken bones.

I've become that friend who has to be looked after at parties to make sure she doesn't somehow fall and injure herself. I've been told countless times, "We should wrap you in bubble wrap," or "You should be put in a giant plastic bubble," and my personal favorite, "You really need to be more careful."

DON'T YOU THINK I'VE TRIED? I can't help it.

I've concluded that I'm just never going to leave my bed, and then I'll be alright. :)

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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