Being on Facebook in the post-Trump election era is a minefield. There are protesters, supporters, and shut-the-hell uppers. There are people peacefully protesting, violently protesting, and people protesting protesting itself. However, in the recent weeks, the most striking thing is the pro- or anti- Women's Marchers debate. Facebook has become the battleground for the feminism discussion.
One of the biggest things I see is what I like to call the "women's anti-feminist movement." I'm talking about people who believe that feminism is pitting women against men, support the pro-life movement, or think that the relative political affluence of women in the United States (compared to other countries) is good enough.
There's nothing wrong with these beliefs. However, they don't crown you an anti-feminist. I think that feminists lately have gotten a bad rap. We're judging the entire movement based on the extremes -- the people that vandalize cars or walk around in the streets naked. We don't do this for most other movements. We don't judge the right based on white supremacists and we don't judge the left based on authoritative communists.
In Moscow, attending the Women's March, I didn't see extremists. I saw families who brought their kids, old ladies (and men), and friends who I've never seen raise their voices. It's these movements and politics of our communities that directly affect us. That being said, I don't think there's an excuse for any person (especially women) not to support the feminist movement.
Do you believe that women should be represented in politics? That women should be making decisions for women? Then you're a feminist. Do you believe that women should be paid the same for the same job? Then you're a feminist. Do you believe a woman shouldn't be judged whether she chooses to be a rocket scientist or a stay-at-home mom? Then you're a feminist. The list goes on and on -- and you don't have to agree with everything you think the "stereotypical" feminist is. But if you agree with just one or two principles of the women's movement, how can you actively exclude yourself from it?
One prevailing complaint I've seen is that the women's movement is some sort of "war on men." That every feminist is a strong, independent women who doesn't need a man. I don't think that could be further from the truth. I'm not going to pretend there aren't extremes; women who have sworn off the world's population of men in their entirety. But this isn't a move to be the better gender. It's a movement to make sure little girls have role models in science. This isn't a movement to shame women who want to get married and have kids. It's to make sure those same women have the ability to make that choice. That they don't feel obligated to because "society said so." Feminism isn't a movement against all men -- feminism is a movement against all people who believe a woman's only place is in the kitchen.
There are lots of women that are defying norms, and crashing glass ceilings. Props to them. Just because the feminist movement is doing well doesn't mean that it's over. You get what you want by advocating for yourself. Why is it okay for lobbyists and big business to petition congress for their interests, but not for women to do the same? Why is there a weird double standard about what political movements are okay?
You're probably not an anti-feminist. You're probably an anti-extremist. I'd go as far to say that most feminists I know are anti-extremists. Don't write off an entire movement based on the fringes.