Your World is Not Only How You Perceive It... But What You Contribute to It
“Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us… or we find it not."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
I come from a small, mountain town. Small. To better illustrate just how small, let me say that I grew up with one stoplight, I graduated with a class of 52 people, and the only place in town open 24 hours was a 7-11, ironically located near that one stoplight. You get the picture…small is an understatement.
Many people can’t fathom such a life, and assume I was victim to deprivation of some sorts living in such a small area. I can see where some people might feel that way, but the thing is, I gained a lot from growing up in a small town, there are a lot of benefits to being raised this way. Everybody knows everybody. That favorite science teacher at the high school? Yeah, that's your best friends mom. The local ranchers that supplied the beef to half the town? You went to school with their son, and he played baseball with your brother. Want to ditch class? Good luck. The local policeman that saw you leaving has your mom on speed dial, and not because you’re a bad kid, but because they’ve been friends for years. You always had someone looking out for you, even in the times when you wished otherwise. You could trust each other, people were genuinely, to the core, simply…good. So this notion, of people being genuinely good, was instilled in me at a very young age.
When I moved to Buenos Aires last year, and even before leaving Denver, I was filled to the brim with a thousand precautionary pieces of advice. I know that all of it, was with good intent, that people were looking out for me, and I don’t doubt that for a second. Watch your purse. Don’t tell anyone where you live. Don’t ever carry too much cash. Be alert. Be aware. People will take advantage of you in a heartbeat.
At the same time that I appreciated all of the advice, I really, honestly do, a part of me hated it too. Not necessarily the advice itself, but the belief that there are people out there who are simply, not good. I detest having to adapt to the mindset that there are people out there who have ulterior motives. I am not comfortable carrying skepticism in my back pocket, ready for whatever situation I confront. It’s just….not me. At the same time, I had absolutely no desire to be an unaware, completely naïve, walking, breathing target.
Reality can sometimes be harsh. It can smack you in the face, hard. Not all people are good. And that’s a real hard one for me to digest. I am one of those naively optimistic people who believe that humanity is, overall good, that people are good.
A very good friend of mine told me something before I went to Argentina, something that I will never forget. His words left imprints on my mind that I cannot erase. I was terrified of leaving my friends in Denver, crying about it one night. I was explaining to him how I have the most incredible people in my life, and how worried I was that I would not find that in Buenos Aires, that I would not find anything even comparable.
He calmly told me, "Leah, what you have here in Denver, you will, without a doubt, find in Buenos Aires, because everything you have here, in this city, is a result of what you carry with you. It’s in here…" And he pointed to my heart. He then asked me, "Don’t you understand that what you get out of life is what you are willing to give out of your soul? Life is like a cycle: Give from the inside, and the result, you receive from the outside. As long as you hold onto that magic, that good within you, you will have it wherever you go… it is with you always, it doesn’t matter where you are.”
I remembered those words he told me, as I learned to live in the enormous city, where I had to be aware everywhere I went. The sad truth is, there do exist those sick souls that are out there to use you, to suck what they can from you and walk away, without an ounce of remorse. And I don’t know why they are the way they are, I’m not about to delve into that one…that’s a subject for an entirely different article. But they do exist, and they can ruin the way we perceive people as a whole, the way we trust, and the way we love one another…if we let them.
As for me, I’m going to hold on to that magic, the morals I learned growing up in that one stoplight town. I’m going to continue to give out the good, because that’s how I was raised, and quite frankly, I think the world needs a little more of it. I will be more aware, more alert and more cautious, without a doubt. Although, I will not let the ugly few in this world tarnish my mindset that this world can be a really spectacular place if you allow it to be. I will hold on to my belief that humanity is good, that people, for the most part, are sincere, they mean well, and they want to help.
Learning the reality of this world can be fierce… it can dampen your optimism, and often times, be very hard to process… because, simply, we don’t want to see the world through those lenses. But what I’ve learned, is that being aware of ugly realities, does not mean you must succumb to them, constantly walking on eggshells because there’s a possibility of bad people or bad situations crossing your path. You do not need to become a cold, hard, closed off human being, in order to survive the possibility of a bad situation. Being aware of something, and letting it affect you are two very different things.
And maybe those who stride along, with a positive outlook on life, the ones we often question, and are quick to label as naïve and innocent, maybe they’re the ones who’ve got it figured out. Maybe their heads aren’t floating in the clouds, maybe they are completely aware of reality, they just choose not to let it affect the way they live their lives. So carry that positivity with you. Carry the good with you. And remember that life is a cycle, starting and growing from the inside of you, and dispersing outward… you get out what you put in. Learn harsh realities, become aware of ugly truths….and be beautiful anyway. Be good anyway. Be sincere, honest and genuine anyway. Be the good you wish to see in this world.