Worth is not something you can earn. You don’t need to rack up an impressive list of achievements before you can claim it as your own. You already have it if you are currently a human

Congrats, you have qualified for the inexplicable value that just comes from living out your own unparalleled, often messy, yet no less important, life on this planet. The real challenge is to see, recognize and believe this worth. (Notice I didn’t say feel. That will be important later.) It is a battle of wits that we all get caught up in throughout life, which we are constantly sparring with our number one opponents: our own thoughts that seek to tear us down and devalue us. Many factors play into the existence of such thoughts, but whether they are inspired by another person’s words, a cultural expectation or our insecurities, they are still our thoughts, and we must take them captive because having self-worth ultimately comes from your own recognition of this worth that you have simply because of who you are, whoever you are.

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Now, at this point, I have a confession to make. I almost didn’t write this post because I was afraid I wasn’t qualified. Who am I to talk about self-worth when it is something I have struggled with my whole life, right up to this very day? Ah, the beautiful irony of feeling unworthy to write an article about self-worth. So, I decided to take my own advice. As it turns out, I realized I am extremely qualified. Here’s why.

I have experience in this subject because I am a human being living life on Earth. Some days, I feel very confident about who I am; other days, not so much and still other days, all of the above.

The point is, we all meet these qualifications. Unless you are lying to yourself or you are a 3-year-old (in which case, wow, you can read), you have struggled with knowing and believing your own self-worth at various times in your life. We are all qualified to put down in words our thoughts, perspectives and “tips,” if you will, on fighting the mental battle that this recognizing our individual worth. I am not any more qualified than any one of you; however, I am qualified. What’s more, my life is significantly different (I hope) than all of yours’, so my observations and reflections on the subject have their own unique perspective, their own worth.

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Stop relying on other people to make you feel valuable.

It’s called self-worth for a reason; it has to stem from what you know about yourself. If you rely too heavily on affirmation from the words and actions of other people toward you, your original source has been misplaced. You have to be so firmly grounded in your own understanding of your value that you will still know the truth of your worth, even if five other people are being super rude and tearing down you, or even 10. (Wow, so rude! Seriously.)

Cut out the comparisons.

It is deadly to your self-worth to compare yourself to someone else for the very obvious reason that they are not you. This goes hand in hand with refusing to rely on others to tell you your value.

Don’t feel insecure about feeling insecure.

In other words, cut yourself some slack! Allow for insecurities because you will definitely have them. If you are a living, breathing, farting human on this planet called Earth, you will have insecurities (farting especially tends to bring out insecurities in many people). So, allow yourself to be human. Your insecurities are an essential part of who you are, but they do not define you.

But don’t let those insecurities hold you back. Don’t fear failure.

Making excuses does not lead to taking on challenges, which does not lead to learning and personal growth. Sweeping your weaknesses under the rug and ignoring them does not give you the opportunity to improve in those areas. Go ahead, do things you’re bad at. As you fail, you will slowly get less bad and/or more comfortable and accepting of your ineptitude. You can’t be good at everything; where’s the adventure in that? That’s like knowing all the answers to a crossword puzzle before you even start. Boring.

Know what is true, even when you don’t feel it.

This is so key. Because self-worth is a mental battle, our emotions ultimately cannot speak objective truth to us regarding who we are and our value as individuals. Emotions are very important and definitely should not be ignored, but the truth of the matter is that, whether we feel it at any given time or not, we have worth – worth that does not ever disappear or diminish.

Honestly, the battle never ends. We will never reach a point in our lives where we are 100 percent confident in who we are 100 percent of the time. It’s just a fact of life; we are going to keep failing, we will keep making mistakes, and we will keep learning and growing because of it. In the meantime, it is essential to our own well-being to maintain the upper hand on our own thoughts and understand our own worth.