Self love is a journey that millions and millions of people find themselves on every single day. (Even Justin Bieber is encouraging girls to go love themselves.) It can be treacherous and hard, but when you make even the smallest amount of progress, it can make all the difference.
Almost every single year when January 1st looms in front of me, I find myself in a panic of making lists of all of the things I want to accomplish, complete and be in the upcoming year. However, I also find myself in a panic about all of the things I didn't check off of my list in the year before. This year, instead of writing down 90 goals like I normally do, I've decided to ditch the other 89 and focus on just one: loving myself. By taking baby steps, I know that when 2016 comes to a close I will come out better than I was before, and so can you.
1. Date Yourself.
This sounds a little silly, but seriously do it. You should know yourself better than anyone else knows you. Make time weekly to spend time with yourself. Your activities can range in extravagance and expense from treating yourself to a pedicure to eating an entire package of Nestlé Toll House cookies in bed watching "Grey's Anatomy." The way you date yourself and treat yourself sets a standard for how others will date you and treat you.
2. Leave yourself love notes on your mirror.
Grab an Expo marker and get to it! Write loving and encouraging things to yourself, and stick them on your mirror or other obvious places where you will see them every day. They can be anything from little sayings, quotes or even scripture. Seeing is believing; the more you see positive messages about yourself the more you'll believe them.
3. Be intentional with your time.
We are all given the same amount of time every single day, and what we do with it matters. Often times, we're stressed out and overwhelmed because we don't balance the time that we're given well enough. Take the time each week to look at how you're spending your time, where you can cut back or spend more time giving back. You'll be happier being more organized, and your stress levels will be lower, which in turn, will help you love yourself a little bit more.
4. Be mindful of the company you keep.
I'm all for "make new friends, but keep the old." However, sometimes new friends are necessary. Spending your time with people who uplift you, encourage you and fuel you to be better can only help you love yourself more. If you are constantly spending time with people who are negative, discouraging and unkind, then you will become more and more like them. You are worth positivity and kindness, so surround yourself with those who feel the same.
5. Be good to your body.
Exercise does the body good, so get your blood pumping! If Beyoncé can do it every day, so can you! Make the time daily to move, even if it's for 15 minutes a day. Exercise helps decrease your risk of diseases, and also does wonders for your mood and mental health.
6. Affirm yourself.
Write down a list of what you love about yourself and post it up somewhere where you'll see it every single day. It can be a little awkward, but give yourself a boost by titling your list "I love myself because..." or " I am…" If you find it difficult, aim to find five things and add onto them.
7. Shut your phone off or delete an app.
Often times, we are so afraid to miss something that we freak out if we don't have our phone in hand. Sometimes, it's nice to ditch the distractions and just be in the moment. Relish the time with friends and family, and stop trying to capture every moment to share for just a little while. This summer, I found myself slightly caught up in the "fitspo" world of Instagram. I was comparing myself and my body to other girls and self-shaming because I didn't see my body as good enough. Looking at those pictures every day did nothing to motivate me, so I deleted Instagram from my phone for most of the summer so I could focus on making my body the best it could be for me, instead of basing it on what the world says is right. So, if there's an app that causes you more harm than good, then get rid of it for a little while and focus on yourself.
8. Get dressed. No really, get dressed.
If you're anything like me, college has really taken a hit to your wardrobe. Over-sized T-shirts, leggings, Nike Norts and sweatshirts with no bra underneath reign supreme. It's cool to be in your comfies, but it can also add to the disheartened feeling that a lot of us carry. So, get dressed! Make your morning less stressful by picking out your outfit the night before; the anticipation of showing it off the next day will help boost your mood and help you wake up! Swap out the 10 minutes you spend in bed scrolling through social media to swipe on some lip-gloss and mascara. When you look better, you feel better. People are also more likely to compliment you, which can help boost your mood and help you have a brighter day!
9. Create a buzz word or theme for your year.
Pick a word, any word! Having a word that encompasses what you want or what you want to be during the year helps set a standard. For example, you could make your word "positivity" and have points that go along with it. Positivity: Positive thoughts about myself and others, positive outlook on situations, surround myself with positive people, etc. Set a standard for what you want in the new year.
10. Be a fountain, not a drain.
Make it a point to stop the negativity. Be generous with the amount of kindness you share with others. Speak life over your friends and your life, be positive and truthful. When you pour your time, talents and other amazing qualities into helping others, it'll only boost your happiness. Giving love helps you love yourself.
May 2016 bring you all the desires of your heart, but most of all, let it bring love.