Why We Need To Do Away With "Coming Out" | The Odyssey Online
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Politics and Activism

Why We Need To Do Away With "Coming Out"

What if we flipped the table and instead it was straight people having to come out?

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Why We Need To Do Away With "Coming Out"
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First of all, I want to clarify that you yourself are not straight, bi, queer, or gay. Those are only labels. You are a person who happens to have the sexuality of straight, bi, queer, or gay, and your sexuality does not define you nor should it. My thoughts towards these labels is a conversation for another day but I understand that our current society, myself included, finds comfort in being able to place people in certain boxes and if my frequent use of these labels offends anyone throughout this article, I apologize, please know that was not my intention.


You're really nervous. Your hands are shaking. Your stomach is nauseous. You haven't slept in weeks thinking about everything that could go wrong when you walk downstairs and look your family in the eyes and recite the same couple of words you've been rehearsing... "Mom? Dad? I'm straight."

What's abnormal about that? It's probably the fact that as a straight woman I'm not expected to tell anyone that. So tell me, why is it that we expect those that are gay to make a grand announcement to every person they meet, over and over again? It's like they can't be gay until WE know that their gay from them coming out and telling us that they're gay. But Guys it's 2017....when are we gonna stop assuming everyone is straight? There should be no #nationalcomingoutday because coming out shouldn't be a thing!

The idea of "coming out" has been made up to be this grand announcement rooted in fear and anxiety, fear and anxiety that the family and friends one "comes out" to will look at them with judgment. Fear and anxiety that the family and friends one "comes out" to won't love them the same because they don't really like the boys in their class, or any boys at all for that matter, or for boys that they don't see themselves ever with a bride but instead, a groom.

What if we flipped the table and instead it was straight people having to come out? What if every single person you knew felt they needed verifcation that you were in fact straight. Can you imagine yourself having to work up the courage over the span of weeks to months, to even years just to walk down to your family, look them in the eye and say "Mom? Dad? I'm straight." This seems odd right, stupid even? Well, it kinda is stupid when you think about it because our society has made this universal assumption that everyone is straight until proven otherwise. But that's where we've messed up. It's time that we realize that this notion of thinking is long outdated. If gay people are expected to "come out" then straight people should have to come out too.

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