Ashley held her cat shaped bong in ecstasy, parading around her apartment. She collected illicit substances from every nook and cranny, like a squirrel preparing for winter.. She found weed under the sink, Ritalin behind the radiator, and acid in the spice rack (which was almost all drugs, Ashley never cooked). Two strands of her glaring blonde hair swung in her face, she pushed them away only to have them block her view again. Her black hoodie and pants also swayed with her body; as she was essentially a stick with a curiosity for large clothing.
Raleigh, a college student like Ashley, watched her go about the process. His head went back and forth as if watching a tennis match. His brown hair in ropes swayed like the ticking of a grandfather clock, his features just as precise and dark. He waited patiently for the zero hour, the time for him to leave his exhausted shell of a being and become one with the world. A drug dealer is nothing without her deal-ee.
Ashley stormed into the room, precariously balancing a multitude of packets in her arms. "Dude, are you ready to get high off your ass-" She was cut short as she tripped over the invisible cat. Everything was sent flying, including the bong. That itself just missed the inviting fringes of a comforting carpet, and landed with a sickening crunch on hardwood floor. They both stared at the debacle, mouths wide open.
Ashley sobbed from her place on the floor as Raleigh swept up the pieces of bong. He sent the remains to their final resting place; The garbage can. As Raleigh turned to face the situation that befell him, he swore he heard a ghostly meow from behind.
"Well, there goes our weekend." He sighed.
"No! There not goes our weekend!" Ashley, defiant from the floor.
"What did you even trip on?"
"Invisible cat"
"E-Excuse me?" Raleigh eyed his friend up and down, lifting an eyebrow from it's comfortable resting place. Ashley scanned the rug with her hands and found something solid. She gave it a healthy slap, and a mmrrowl was heard along with the scampering of footsteps to another room. Raleigh raised both his eyebrows.He was baffled for exactly 2.45 seconds before comming up with the most logical retort, "I t-thought this apartment didn't allow pets?"
"This apartment is an anomaly." She stood up with a jerk. "But Raleigh," She gripped him by the shoulders. "We need to get a bong."
"Are you out of your mind? Actually, don't answer that. It's almost night time!" As he said it, the mid afternoon sun fell into a beautiful evening glow. Raleigh looked out the window and gasped in fear at what he saw. A green serpentine dragon was restlessly roaming the street. "See? they're coming out already!"
Ashley stared out the window with him. "Oh, that's Zed. It’s nice." They watched as a man run down the street a little too close to where Zed was. Next they saw as the supposedly 'nice' dragon proceed to devour the man's intestines.
"And now it's distracted. Let's go." She began to search for money, under floor boards and in her couch.
"Ashley, we can't just-"
"Dude, we're buddies, right?"
"Yeah but-"
"So the main jist of buddies is trust, okay? You gotta trust me on this. I won't let you get hurt (like that guy down there) and I won't let this weekend go to waste. I think I got enough. Do you think twenty dollars is enough? Just kidding, there’s no way in hell anyone would ask under thirty. At this point, I’m hoping for a miracle. Let’s do this." With that she exited the apartment, and Raleigh followed her nervously.
On the second floor of the building, there were only supposed to be 10 apartments. Ashley's was the 11th, marked as such. She slammed the door behind her, only to have the eleven fall off and float back into place.
"Ok! So the way I see it, all we have to do is skip down two blocks, run across the park, (find one hundred dollars in cash on the ground) and bam! Corner store, and bong." She explained as they descended the stairs. They came to the outside, the night air blowing robustly in their faces. "Let's not get a cat bong. I don't like cats anymore. Oh look! Hi Zed!" She waved.
The dragon reared it's blood stained maw. Raleigh screamed. The dragon gave a polite wave and went back to it's meal. "See? That’s pretty chill." They kept walking.
Along the sidewalk, they passed minor imps and demons emerging from sewer drains and thin air. Some wore fancy suits, others were as naked as the day the materialized on the 7th plane. Few gave curt nods as they passed Ashley. Raleigh cowered behind her and tried not to step on anyone's tails.. They turned a corner, and lamp lights flickered on, electricity coating the air.
Raleigh nervously asked, "So, um, Ash, how do you know all these... people? Or, how do these people know you?"
"My Dad." She answered. Her reply provoked memories of when they first met, a few weeks ago. Raleigh thought she was cool, cool enough to hang out at her place and smoke. To this she responded, "We can't hang out there. My dad's there. I hate my dad." They then spent the rest of the day at a college cafe with Ashley trying to sell some of her 'finer wares' to the manager.
Raleigh fumbled over his words. "Sorry, I didn't mean to pry."
“It’s alright. Most of these demons are mean to me. Like those harpies. Duck." She pushed Raleigh so hard that he hit the pavement with his bare hands. Ashley flopped next to him. Within seconds there was a screech above them, and the sound of empty claws. "Look!" She forced his head up. "The corner store!" There it was, with a loud blue sign reading, "WELCOME, YES. HELLO." The only thing between them and the store was a sinister looking playground. Raleigh could see the hordes of the damned pressing in from every corner.
"This is where we run." Ashley helped him to his feet. The harpies cursed and flew at them again, with talons outstretched. They bolted, leaving the fowl bird beasts to crash into concrete. They crossed the road, panting as they dodged incoming monsters and blows.
Ashley jumped over a cement wall. "Raleigh! Do you have a weapon? Cause you're gonna need it!" She punched a swamp monster and waited for him. Ashley was in the center of the park when he caught up.
"Yeah but," he panted, "I need a blood sacrifice, to, hoooo, get it out." He rested with his hands on his knees.
"Oh , well no problem." Ashley picked up a wood chip and scratched open her hand. She gave him a hearty handshake, then wiped her shirt. "Fucking playgrouds. You usually use your own, right? This summoning is on me dude. Get it out and let's go. Raleigh took the opportunity and reached behind him, as if grabbing something out of a backpack. The blood splattered on an invisible box, forming an outline. As he pulled up it became more distinctive, more solid and colored. In his hands Raleigh held a bazooka, fired up and waiting for him to pull the trigger. He also had unlimited ammo, which was a nice plus.
He swung it over his shoulder, taking aim. With one shot he took out a stumbling creature that was advancing on Ashley.
Meanwhile, Ashley was running ahead, punching down anything and everything in her path. Her sights were set firmly on the corner store and she dashed with a deep passion. However, just as she was in range of the store's blazing lights, two figures roared and jumped from the shadows. One was a giant blue serpent, poised to strike. The other was a lumbering centipede with too many legs.
The snake struck, sinking it's acid fangs into the gravel, missing Ashley by a hair. Raleigh hit the bug with a blast, but it bounced off the centipede’s shell, with the grenade exploding semi-harmlessly behind him. A few limbs were nicked from the bug, but it was still as mobile as ever.As he readied another shot, Raleigh noticed Ashley wasn't faring well with just her fists against a 20-foot cobra.
"Ashley! Don't you have weapon too!?" he yelled. He aimed again, hitting it in the head. It screamed and lunged, but he kicked it back.
"Sure I do! I just have to-" She wasn't able to finish that sentence because her jaw unhinged to an unworldly width. Out flooded black liquid, dripping over her chin and splattering on the ground. Her eyes whited out and her pupils became non existent, blurry masses. Out came a wooden handle, which she mechanically gripped. Raleigh heard a horrible scraping, the sound of meat grinding and peeling. Out came a nail studded bat, glowing with a devilish yellow aura.
Ashley coughed and wiped her mouth, "That! Come on, Raleigh!" The snake, horrified by what it saw, slung a vile substance to protect itself. It grazed Ashley and made small holes that quickly bored into her arm. She yelled and hit the snake square in the neck.
“Y’know, since a snake is such a simple creature, I’ve always wondered where like the tail ends and the head slash neck begins.” Even in the midst of battle Ashley spoke candidly. Raleigh just stared at her, wide- eyed. “You know? Like if the tail is hERE-” She hit the snake’s tail. “And if the neck is HERE-” She emphasized her words with a thwack to the snake’s spine. “Is the meeting point between tail and necK HERE!?” She slammed down like a professional wrestler onto the very middle of the serpent, and it hissed with rage. Raleigh couldn’t help but be somewhat impressed by his drug dealer’s performance.
Raleigh, however, was having a harder time dealing with his chilopoda. The bug was relentless and unthinking as it swung wildly around. His projectiles rebounded as though he were shooting tennis balls instead of deadly weapons. With kicks as his only means of harming the creature, the situation seemed hopeless.
The creature’s tail made contact, sending Raleigh flying into nearby bushes. In a blur he saw Ashley jumping over the snake and reaching for the door to the corner store. He gasped at the betrayal, realizing that she had abandoned him for glassware. He felt his vision blur as reached up to fire one last shot.
But at the apex of launch, he heard a defiant scream. In a fast pace of events the centipede's head was ripped off and tossed aside. Insect blood gushed and coated Raleigh from head to toe. When the shower ended, he saw Ashley standing victoriously on the bug's corpse, still twitching. She was holding the snake's head and her club in one hand, and reached out with the other.
Ashley helped Raleigh up. "You ok?" She patted him off the best she could.
Raleigh stuttered and looked between the girl and the two long bodies. "B-But I thought you were.. doing...the?"
"I told you, no harm. Where’s your head at? Oh it’s over there. Grab it and follow me, I think the coast is clear." Ashley pointed out the cadaver’s cranium, and gave him a smile that made everything feel real. She walked away,dragging her club in the dust. Raleigh stared at her lazily wandering figure in amazement.
He did what he was told, and awkwardly held the monster's head and the bazooka in his arms. Ashley held the door open for him, and he entered. The buzzing lights were a welcome sight after unfathomable darkness. The manager behind the counter, a fat, balding, Egyptian man waved fondly at them.
"Yes, welcome, open twenty four hours. I watched you from inside, but I couldn't help you because of my lack of will and also I couldn't call the police." He nervously patted the counter drawer. "But now, you are safe. So, Welcome!" He smiled broadly.
"Yeah, cut the crap Cohelo." Ashley slammed the snake head on the desk. "We need some glass."
Cohelo quickly placed the bleeding mass on paper towels, and unlocked two cupboards behind him. "Ah yes, we have a good selection this week. just got some new arrivals. What happened to your old one Ashley? Or did you just want a new one?" Raleigh placed the centipede head on the counter, which was also hastily put on something absorbent.
" The invisible cat broke my old one." Ashley sighed.
"Oh yeah, I’ve been there buddy, believe me. But, at least you have many new options, yes? Also, we have plenty of other supplies in the store.” Cohello beamed at his wares and twiddled his thumbs. Raleigh began to wander aimlessly through the aisles.
Ashley scanned the many intristic bongs, ranging from hookah to basic pipes. She settled on a dragon one,with the tail opening up to the mouthpiece. Raleigh came back and timidly placed an ice cream sandwich on the counter. Ashley slapped her cash down, sealing the deal.
Cohelo rang up the items. "So that will be one standard (but beautifully crafted) bong, and one Kemp's ice cream sandwich, coming up for a total of 252 dollars,and thirty cents. You will be paying with a... twenty and.." He trailed off, looking at the two heads before him.They suddenly burst into smoke, leaving behind five gold coins each. "Yes, hunting money. This should be more than enough." He cheerfully stored the coins in a hidden drawer in the register, and gave back change in plain bills.
Ashley grabbed her items, now safely wrapped in a plastic bag. Just as they stepped out the door, Cohelo made a decision. "Wait! Ashley and company!" They swung around. "If you would like to find shelter, I think I may have a comfy place, free of charge. "
He walked passed the register, all the way back to a dim corner of the store. He opened an innocent looking door that revealed an elegantly decorated space. A single desk lamp, with gentle incense permeating the room. On the floor was a real, if small, Turkish rug, along with spotless and comfortable looking couches and pillows.
"Since you're my best customer, and it's very late, would you both like to stay and 'light up' with me?"
Ashley smiled wearily. "Hell. Yes. I owe you Cohelo! Come on Raleigh, this is what we came for in the first place, right?" She took the lead into the room, dive-bombing into a beanbag.
Raleigh felt welcome and crashed on a pile of pillows. Cohelo locked the door and dropped to the low rise couch in front of them. Ashley took the ornate bong and found some matches in the stand next to her. She was handed bottled water and it was poured in with complete caution. She dug around for some weed in her pocket, which was delicately dug into the ground stem. Covering the carb, she put a match to where the dragon's mouth was, put her lips in, and took a hit.
Cohelo and Raleigh followed suit, and when it was passed around several times, the room was full of haze and wandering sighs. Raleigh was perplexed, as he felt nothing change. "Hey Ash, are you feeling anything yet?" But Ashley couldn't answer, as her face was melting. He turned to Cohelo who was invisible and floating
floating
floating
Raleigh was in a box that opened up to the universe. His eyes dilated, with the colors melting and burning and dripping he was floating and radiatinf a and dr oolinf and loosing and waht what if whe when we were which is to say why whyw hwy whyw hwy whyw hwy whyw whyw why why why whyw hwy whyw hwnwhywhwywhywhwyhwyhwyhwywhyhwywhywhwyhwyhwyhwyhwyhwyhwyhwyhwywhyhwwhywhwyhwyhwyhwywhwywywhywy whh.
He saw static. Nothing but static s̜͍͈̯̱̥̣t̥̘͇͕̹a̲̣͔̠̺̩̭ṭ̭̰̝̖͙ḭ͕c̻̦̤̙̬͍ͅ ̲̗̤͓̜͙̮̗s̭̜̼̗t̫̪a̳̺̣͈̘͈̪̫t̟̱̗̖̭̳̻i̞̲̮̠c̩̱͈̪̱͎̠ ̝̝̯̘͔͔͎s̯̜͇͍t̲̮̼͕̠a̩͇t͖̭̪͇̖i̙̩͇c͚̤̤̼ͅ ̻̠̮͖̝͓͈s̼̜t͎̯̬ͅa̤̟͕̼̘̳ṱ̮͖̝̥̠̭̬̬i͇̥̟̳̻̣ͅc̞̗̖̹̪ ͈̫̱̞̺s̬t̰a͈̳̳̼͉̲̟̼t̝͔͍̞̙̖̞ͅi͕͖̯͚͍͕̼c̟ ̲͚̻̝̟͚s̙̫͍̹t͉͈a̗͔͇̖̞ṯ͓̖̰̼̥̺̩i̱̹̝̭̺̞̩c̖͖͇̩̭̦̝̪̻a͉͍̩͈̻ ̤̯̳͍̲s͙̬̣͓t̞̦̣̗͇͔͎̱i̥̼̯͙̞̜̝͓a͕̗͈̙t̘͉͇̙̦ḭ͓͇̰͖̰c̜͎̘ ̟̭̥̺͙s̹̥͙͉̤ͅa͙̜̟͎̼̟̫̜t̝̱͓̪a̪i̞̤ṱ̘͈̥̠̫̖̰c̜͕͚͉̺̼ͅ ͕͔͕̗͓̳̰ͅa͔͇̩̝̠ͅr̩͓s̙̠͖͇̻̘i̱͚̥̫͔a̪̺̙͔t̯i̙͔̠̰c͈͚ ͓̼̘̼̜s̬̭͙̞̦̻t̘͙̭̱͉̥͉i̳̩̦̥̩̦̰a̮̰̼̗̬ṱ̳̰̩s̮̙i͎̯̬̪̯̘͉d̖͈͕̦̖̱͉̱̹c̣̞̼ ̘̹̥̟̹̻̬̺s̱̥͈̠̩̭t͚̝̳͚̳̙̠̤̱a̟͇i̲͓̟̬̞̲t̤͎̻̞i̘̬̻̳̬͈c͎̖̰͙̠̦̤̞ ̬̲͇͇̥͕̱s͉͔̮͖̼̪̹͓̝I̞̭s̪̝̦t͕̞͍̺̯̫̹̫a͔͙̰̮̱͙̰i̹̜̩̮͇̭̪t̜̹̬̲̞͕c̦̗͓͉ ̝͙͎͓͓͕̣̱̗S͓͙T͓̬͕̗͖̝a̩̗̳̭̬͙͕t͇̬̲̱͖̥̞ͅị̠̮̦̩̩̙̣c̯̝̘̦̲͖ ̭̻̺̜͎̹S̭̟͔̣̬̟T̙̘͓̙̜̮̯̟A̫̜͖̼͕̗T͙̯Z̰̝͓͕͓̰͔̦I̯͓̟̙̗̲̩T̘͚̩̼̗̥̖̙C̫̩̩̞̮̺̞ ̭̲̭͍S̲̤̟͖͖̦̞T̥͍A̟̲͔͚̥̟̻T̖͇̻I̱̠̖̼͎͙̹̣ͅC̰̤̝̦̯̪̹̭ ͔̘̥̱Ṯ͎̘S̮͈̙̪͓̪͈̣I͚͙A̘̪̜̭̙̬T̲͙͍͕̲̬̪̭̟I͓ͅD͎͔̬̟̬ ͍͕͈̭̣̘̗̣C̘̙̼̳̥A̫T̖͔͍̻͈A̦̠̦T̮̗̞̣͔͎̹̬͍I̩̙͕̥̹̝̻͔͙C̥A̗̭͉ ̹̰͓͙̳̪͉̰͚S̩̰̟̪͍͖͈͍T̟͍̼̲͇̫̞D̲̙A̞͔͖̮̯̖̱̭I̬͔̜̳̙͍S͈̱̫̼͎͙͍͍D̙͔͔̭̲͇ ͕̖͇͙̙̩̩S͍̲̲̱̱̹̝T̥͔̭͓̮A͓T̖I̝̤̹̳C̘̠ ̦̪͍S̰͍̬̭͖̮ͅT̤A̦͉̘T̹̣I͔͕̤͓C̹̘̺̝ ̰ͅS̤̞̬͚̺T̼̩A͎̮̻̗͓̜̖I̺̪Ṯ̣̤̜I̼̼̲̩̥͍̤̳ͅC̪ ̝̜̝̩S̹͓T̩A̘̼̠̦̟͔̙̠I͙̣̝̠̮̲T̯̭͚͍̤I̩̗̯̮ ̗̭̩̺̗̬̤C̘̥ ͓͍̼̜̦S̻̞̱̟̖A͉̟O̼̥̯̹̫͚̩̠̺S̤̫T̤̳̫̝̻I̖͔̲̱C̪̙͚̜̯̩̞ ̺̭̪͚͔̱͔I͈̖̜̣͓̟̞S̬͇͎͙̞̥̭T͎A̜̹̱͈̟͉̬ͅI̻̝A̦͉̹̬͇̪̞̣T̩̖͉͚̫͙̰͎D͙͈ ͓̗̥͔S̥̫̺͎͔͍̣̰O͙͙A͙̹͖͈͍I͉̻̦̩͚͖̱O̘̬̱̲͇̜̰͙A̪̖̼̖͙̮Y̞̘͎̰͇̳̟̫S̞̼͙ͅT̳̝Ḭ͓̬̘C̘͎̱͍A͓̬̙̪̗̖͙͉S͈͓̫T͕̰U̖̰̗̱͈A͎͇T̮̯̖̤̯̬I͇͓̜͇͔S̖̹̬̰̞̥͉ͅC͔̫͚]̠̰̙̬̤̰̲͉ ̟͉̥̯̘̘S̙̞T̩̠͓̫͙̜͎͖A̘̻̬̫̜I̠͔̼̜̬̦͙̤T͍̘̞̱͓̹X̯C̹͖͕S̲͚̪͔̝͈S̥͎͎̳͖T̹̬͕̼A̗̞̝̼͙T̜͈̩̲ͅI̪̞C͉ ͉̥s̼͚̫̻̦̖͚ͅṯ̯̟a̭̰̮̱̥t̯̪̜̳̻͔i͔͔̲̬̘̹ͅc͉͈̱͍̫̳̤͖
̲̫̗̪̼ͅ
Everythign was on repeat ueyes it son repeat why wouldntit be i mean wos pells words like thta who makes the rilens i wanna knwo i denmand DEMANS to knwo bur hwy didt he give the stiff ir tas the bodies is this a bad trip!? No jsut average thank u fo aking ill be yur flight attendant for today ddisl did u smoke all of it no i didnt bore too this water os flowing aroun me i thing kinm startng to fell somehting now Ashley feels betetr tahne bedore why the jumping blea nad the everythign why even the answe is ok and we're going now to space lest go rgth jow get on your fuckign suit u peice of shiti have homework tommoworo is it sunday ????
I hate it. So mcuh . so f***i mcuh
I T
Why are your eyes like that
I don't know
do you care? Do you listen?
I don't know.
I think the eeeeeeeeeefcts are wearing offf f f
Do yo think so? I feel sick/
the lights on lets go home
one more
ok ?? ok
one more please
sounds good
And it was all good.