This summer I worked at a brand new restaurant in my hometown, and I love it. But one thing that has been more prevalent both in and out of work this summer is the treatment I receive from men. When I told someone close to me about this treatment (who happens to be a man), I was told: “Haha well c’mon even I am guilty of that sometimes”. This really surprised me that someone who I am close to and love dearly is not only guilty of things such as looking at women’s chests instead of their eyes while talking to them, but also doesn’t see that type of treatment a problem.
This was not the reaction that I was expecting. I expect that it being 2016, all men know to look in my eyes when speaking with me and nowhere else. This is an easy one and is just giving women the respect that they deserve because we are not here for you to eye over. As my female coworker said once, “If I can tell what you are thinking by the way your eyes look then you need to stop looking at me that way”. Your private thoughts are private for a reason. It is degrading and uncomfortable for me to have to know your thoughts with just one look. No woman deserves to have that unwanted experience, and it is way too prevalent in our culture. So prevalent that it is easy for me to block out those looks and cat calling comments such as, “Ooo you looking good today”, that I receive from people who I have never had a conversation with. There is no need for that because while I know I try to look good, I do it for myself and not to hear comments from strangers.
Another thing that might be shocking is that we also have bodies that have muscle and that can carry heavy things, so while on the topic of things to not say anymore, let's stop telling women to put things down because they “might hurt themselves”. I am 5’8’’ and while I don’t do Olympic lifting or Crossfit, I am not incapable of lifting a decent amount of weight. I actually may be able to lift more weight than certain men due to my varsity sports background.
Last but certainly not least, never, ever, EVER, complain amongst yourselves about why it's crazy that some woman got a higher paying job over you. It happened cause she’s smarter than you and was better for the job. It’s just trashy to go to a restaurant with your buddy to complain that she was undeserving of it. Actually, it’s just trashy to do any of these things, and since we could very well have a woman be our next president and the fact that we live in the year 2016, it is just inexcusable to treat all women with anything but respect.
