There should be a limit on the number of times people are allowed to tell me how much I’m missing out on by being in a relationship in college. It makes sense if you’re the type of person who goes out with the sole purpose of meeting people, but for me that was never my idea of fun, even when I was single. When I went out, I went out to have fun with my friends and take a break from school and work- meeting a guy was the last thing on my mind. All I can tell you is what my college experience has given me. Having experienced both sides, I’ll give you the point of view of a single college student and a college student in a serious relationship.
People look forward to all kinds of experiences in college, and some are sure that getting into a serious relationship isn’t one of them. Dating can be one of the scariest things for some people during college because people often think that college is a place you go if you don’t want to be in a serious relationship. Most people feel like dating is such a bad idea in college because they are afraid of what being in a serious relationship entails. Maybe this is because it almost resembles the relationship with your parents that you tried to get away from by going to college-- having to tell someone where you’re going, who you’re with, and what time you’ll be back. But in a relationship, there’s an important difference: you’re simply telling them what you're doing; you’re not asking for permission. When you’re in a strong, healthy relationship, you know the difference from right and wrong (sound familiar?). You know that it might not be the best idea to go drinking alone with that guy you had a crush on all through freshman year, so you simply don’t do it. These things don’t necessarily arise from fear of getting in trouble like they did when you were a kid; they arise from not wanting to do something to hurt your significant other.
Dating someone in college can be great! There’s always someone you can complain to when you’re stressed out, or someone to root for you along the way (Also, free meals are often involved, whether someone’s paying for the meal or decides to cook dinner!). An added benefit to dating in college is if you’re dating a fellow college student, you have someone who understands and likely shares some of the struggles you’re going through. College can be one of the toughest points in your life, and it’s important to have someone in your life that can help you through it. You’re probably thinking, “That’s what friends are for!” While that’s true, your friends do sometimes have other things to worry about. It isn’t always their responsibility to be concerned about what you’re going through, so sometimes it’s an added bonus to have someone who solely cares about you and what’s best for you.
I believe that there’s a time in every person's life where they meet someone they’re sure will play a huge role in their life. For me, that’s when I know a person is worth the time, and I personally don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything. I knew I only wanted a relationship if it were a serious one; I didn’t want to waste my time with just any old someone, because that’s exactly what it would be-- a waste of time. I've always hated the idea of getting to know someone, spending loads of time with them, and then, BOOM. Gone. They’re just out of your life and you never hear from them again. I knew I didn’t want to spend my time on something I knew wasn’t going to last. When I met my boyfriend, I never really worried or cared about missing out on anything because I knew that the relationship would be a worthwhile experience. I never really had serious relationships towards the beginning of school, because I never found someone that I thought was going to take the relationship as serious as I would; I didn’t even want to go down that road. When I met my boyfriend, I knew he was different, and that our relationship at least had a chance at lasting. I think it’s important for people to have certain “standards” when deciding to date someone because it takes a lot of work and it’s important to at least give it a good shot on both ends. Things in this relationship have gone really well, and he has been a great support system throughout my college career. He’s always listened to my struggles, whether school or work-related, and has inspired me to strive to be a better person. That’s one of my favorite parts about being in a relationship: always having someone to share in your accomplishments.
It’s important for a person to really consider all the sides there are to dating in college. People will speak in favor of or disparage both stances, but really, it’s up to each individual, bearing in mind that one day it could lead to a serious future. There are arguments for both sides, so all you can do is what you think is right for you.
