On August 22nd my life changed forever, but we can come back to that. As I sat in my first day of classes as a college freshman one of my professors asked us to write down our characteristics. What about ourselves makes us who we are? Who shaped us into who we are? For some this might be a difficult concept, the idea of who am I? But for me it has always been pretty simple. I am Sarah Washerstein (swash), my parents are Gail and Ira, my brother is Mike, and my dog is Ginger. Simple right, well not exactly. You see on August 22nd that changed, my parents went from Gail and Ira the dynamic duo to just Gail. In the split of a second my father left this world and heaven gained another angel.
There are twenty- four hours in a day, twenty-four hours to make a difference. Twenty-four hours to grieve, to cry, to process, or to move on. I spent eighteen years of my life with the greatest man to walk this earth, and for that I will be forever grateful. Each day we wake up and forget to be grateful for the small things, the sun, the air, the earth. We become so caught up in the big picture we forget to see what is right in front of us. We take for granted the moments we spend with our loved ones never thinking they will be our last. Every moment we have with every person we love is so incredibly precious, so incredibly valuable. Each word we tell them should be kind, for we should never end on bad terms. It is imperative that no one in our lives ever question our love. I know that my Dad knew that he was so greatly loved, he never questioned that once.
The loss of my father created the worst pain I have ever felt. It brought the darkest thoughts into my head, and tried to cripple me down to nothing. This loss tries to takeover and force you to become the person you never wanted to be. The worst version of yourself. However, I rose up because that is what he would want me to do. That is always what they want us to do, when we lose our loved ones. They want us to be strong, to push forward, to do our best. They want us to live again, to breathe again, to be grateful for the small things. To remember them and live our own lives in their honor.
I will never understand why they took him from me, but I know I am living the life he always envisioned for me. I will spend each day being the young lady he raised, and living my life to make him proud. Although I can no longer squeeze his hand or feel his embrace, his words will stay with me forever. To the man who taught me everything I know, and brought me the greatest amounts of joy each day. I love you, always and forever.