A few days ago, I woke up to get ready for class. I took a shower, dried my hair, put on my makeup, and got dressed. After shoving my laptop into my half destroyed backpack, I grabbed my keys and started to go toward the door.
Then, out of nowhere, a small voice inside of me whispered, “Maybe you shouldn’t go today.” I didn’t know why I suddenly felt this way. But just like that, after one small anxious thought, I sat down on my couch and took off my shoes.
My classes for this semester are really interesting. I looked presentable. I wasn’t feeling sick. I just suddenly felt like I couldn’t go.
Anxiety is the leading mental health disorder among college students. Anxiety can be defined as “a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome,” (Merriam-Webster). The uncertainty of events can come from simply walking down the sidewalk to get to class, or even trying to go out with your friends. You don't always know what could and will happen, and anxiety can take this feeling and run.
"21.9 percent of students said that within the last 12 months, anxiety had affected their academic performance, defined as receiving a lower grade on an exam or important project, receiving an incomplete, or dropping a course," (BU Today).
I have been there. I have received a lower grade just because I was nervous or unsettled about something. I have missed a class that would have provided me with important information.
I know how it feels to suffer through the highs and lows.
From the perspective of a college student, I am in a position where I’m learning how to be professional. I am constantly gaining new knowledge on how to contribute and interact in the adult world. This is a tough position for someone who struggles with anxiety. How does one explain to a professor that you missed their class not because you don’t care, but because the crushing weight of everything else you had going on forced you to shut down?
There is a major stereotype when it comes to mental health. This is why it is so hard to admit that you have a problem. Having anxiety, depression, or any type of mental health disorder does not change your value as a person. Seeking help does not mean accepting an embarrassing defeat. It means you are striving to live a better life.
Someone once told me, “If you drive your car at full speed all the time, eventually you will crash.” This really got me thinking of an interesting concept.
Have you ever been in the backseat of a car while the driver was driving absolutely crazy? They are a stranger to turn signals, they stop abruptly, and you’re clinging to your seatbelt the entire ride. This is what it is like to battle anxiety. You feel like the passenger during an uneasy car ride.
The goal is to not let your anxiety drive you. This is way easier said than done. Pretending it doesn’t exist doesn’t cure you by any means. Understand what triggers you, learn what works for you, and though you may feel like you can never take full control of your anxiety, control the way you approach it. An outlook change can work wonders. Work on accepting yourself for who you truly are. Your anxiety does not define you.
One of the most important things you need to know is you are not alone. Anxiety is a problem millions of people struggle with. Having anxiety doesn’t make you any less of a person. It just makes you human.
