" 'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring not even a mouse..."

That is how the famous holiday story is told but the tale is not the same for us all. For people who struggle with anxiety or depression, the holidays may evoke a less joyful feeling. If you're like me and you absolutely dread the holidays, the poem might feel something like this: " 'Twas the month before Christmas, when all through my mind, anxiety was stirring making holiday joy hard to find."

The holiday season brings excitement and happiness for most. It's a time when people surround themselves with their loved ones and revel in the pleasure of exchanging gifts and family meals. The exact moments that evoke bliss for many may evoke uneasiness in others. I, personally have never been quite a fan of the holiday season. I love seeing my family together and happy, but I can never escape the anxiety that prevents me from sharing that same delight. The same goes for many others who deal with mental illness.

The thought of spending an entire day surrounded by family, music, gifts, and food sounds like a recipe for a panic attack in my eyes. It is incredibly easy to become overwhelmed by all of the festivities and not be able to fully enjoy them like everyone else. That constant engagement in social interaction causes me and many others to plan our escape to the nearest empty room as soon as we can. The stress of having to catch up with family members and answer one billion questions about school, work, and your love life is exhausting for some. Thanksgiving and Christmas present an incredible amount of pressure to plaster a smile across your face; what's ironic about that is the fact that these holidays might force you to engage in events that do the exact opposite. If there is family drama like turmoil between relatives or being the black sheep of the group, the holidays induce the same nervousness a test might; it begins to be more of a chore, something you're nervous about and can't wait to get over with.

Not only are the initial celebrations anxiety provoking, but the time of year, in general, is incredibly difficult for people struggling with depression. When you're struggling with such sadness, it can feel impossible to get into the holiday spirit. As we grow older, the dynamic of these amusements can drastically change. Not everyone can be with their loved ones during the holidays and not everyone gets along with the loved ones they are with. Those complex situations make Christmas and Thanksgiving a lot less enjoyable. Another aspect to consider is that for those who have lost someone, grief has the incredible power to subdue any kind of Christmas cheer. The holidays are no fun when they're spent missing the ones you love, whether it be relatives, friends that have become family or loved ones that have passed away.

Now it's not all "bah-humbug" and stockings full of coal. Mental illness does make the holiday season hard to enjoy, but it's not impossible. With the right coping mechanisms, it is possible to find a way to overcome the dread of Christmas and Thanksgiving by finding the things that you DO enjoy. Don't be afraid to take the moment and step away from the crowd to relax or express to your family members that you're feeling overwhelmed. On the other hand, if it is your family members inducing such feelings, make the extra effort to surround yourself with other loved ones that can comfort you. Lastly, if you're experiencing grief, it is okay to do just that: grieve. There are no rules that say you can't be sad or anxious during this time of year. Take care of yourself first and celebrate in any way you emotionally can.

In conclusion, the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. Maybe Christmas doesn't have to look like the commercials or shows on TV. Maybe I can celebrate it in ways that are just right for me.