Anxiety is not often talked about, yet is very often felt. People of every age, gender and race find themselves plagued by anxiety, but it manifests itself in many different forms. I have struggled with anxiety for the past seven years, and though I am fortunate enough to now be able to manage it well, I still find that my anxiety likes to speak to me every once in awhile.
Maybe all of this makes me sound crazy. And maybe some of these are a bit exaggerated. But I feel fairly confident that anyone who has ever struggled with anxiety will be able to relate to a few of these fears.
Things that my anxiety says to me:
“Yes, that person is staring at you…”
“...now you are not allowed to be comfortable until you get to a bathroom and get out whatever is stuck in your teeth.”
“Yep. You failed that test.”
“I don’t care how long you studied for. Your dozens of flashcards are just simply not enough to help you pass that exam!”
“Answer that text right away…”
“...or else your friend will think that you hate her and you will never have friends again!”
“You are not allowed to have free time.”
“You have to manage working, homework, friends and sleep! You can only pick three of those things!”
“Have you figured out who is going to ask you to that school dance in six months?”
“Or who you’re going to ride with? Or who is going to host the picture party? Or where you are going to have the dinner?”
“Do you know your exact monthly budget for when you go off to college?”
“If you don’t balance your money perfectly and precisely, you’re basically going to be broke by Thanksgiving.”
“Teaching is not going to be enough to support you.”
“I don’t care what will make you happy. Pick a career that allows you to be stable and independent.”
Currently, many of these anxieties are completely irrelevant to my life. However, they are just a small sampling of the many things that my anxiety has screamed at me over the years. A friend once told me that everyone has anxiety, but just on different levels. Some certain thoughts may trigger it in one person, but may have no effect on another. Anxiety is personal to everyone who feels it, and there is absolutely nothing wrong or shameful with it.
It is normal.
