Dear Ex Boyfriend,
I wasn't sure if I would end up writing this, but here I am. Its been a little over a month and we've both already moved on. I kind of expected that from you, but I was surprised that I myself, took the steps to move on. But let me start by saying, I miss you. I miss the laughing moments, I miss our Wawa runs, but most of all I miss the guy who I thought you were.
Time after time again, you proved yourself and showed me your true colors. I let that relationship go on far too long, to the point where I lost myself. I lost relationships with my friends, relationships with my family, and most importantly myself. I constantly put you before myself, but only to get a slap in the face. I cared for you far too much for the hurt you caused me that I have carried into my new relationship. Each time a girl would message me on Facebook, saying you were trying to hook up with them, a part of me died. But each time this happened, I clung to you even more for reasons I still do not understand. The thought of being without you literally scared me and I wish I knew why because the pain I felt for almost two years was definitely not worth it. I then began to grow a fear of going on Facebook, expecting to see a message from a new girl saying the same thing. This went on for months and still you never saw how this affected me. Facebook, of all things, that's what I was afraid of. How embarrassing is that?
Something I've always wondered is why someone cheats. Why be with someone if you're thinking about being with someone else? I told you over and over that you can't have the best of both worlds. Why was commitment such an issue? I just have so many questions that will never be answered, but honestly I don't think I really want to know the answers.
My therapist has been telling me that our relationship was just a chapter in my life story that hasn't been finished yet. Writing this letter will allow me to end this chapter of my story and move on to the next one. I will always look back on the fond memories we have as well as the painful times that will show me to never treat my significant other the way you treated me. I will never again allow a man to control my life, nor will I be stopped from living my life. You truly ruined my first semester of college by not allowing me to go out and have fun on the weekends, but honestly I should blame myself for allowing you to make decisions for me.
I don't want to end this letter on a bad note, because not all of our relationship was all that bad. It is sad that the bad times overcame the good times, but life happens and people make bad decisions. I wish you the best of luck in your life and with the decisions you make in the future. I miss your family so much. It's also a breakup with them, not just you. I lost several people who welcomed me into their homes when I had no where to go and always cared for me. Maybe one day we can be friends again, but until that day your mistakes will haunt you. I am not one to hold a grudge but I do believe in karma, so if life is a b*tch, you know why. You will always be my first boyfriend, my first love, my first everything, but for now our story must come to an end.
The man I am with now treats me like a true princess, the way I have always deserved to be treated. He doesn't take my presence for granted and constantly reminds me of my beauty that I do not see. I hope your significant other can do the same for you as you should do for them because that is extremely important. Be the guy you wanted to be that you couldn't be for me.
Sincerely,
Bailey