An Apology To The Boy I Never Gave A Chance | The Odyssey Online
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An Apology To The Boy I Never Gave A Chance

I never thought it would be like this.

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An Apology To The Boy I Never Gave A Chance
Marissa Miller

My biggest regret was believing that he was better for me than you were. I never understood why you still stuck by me even though I still continued to choose him over you. I still wonder after all this time how lucky I was to have someone like you in my life. You were so willing, kind, and always kept me on my toes, and for that I am grateful.

I never realized the grand prize was in front of me this entire time until It was too late. It wasn't that I was too good for you, but that you were too good for me. I was a mess you shouldn't have had to clean up. You were the right one and I wish I would have seen that sooner. I can only blame myself, and I'm so sorry for hurting you when I was hurting. After all the time you took bending over backwards for me, you didn't deserve this.

Having you as my rock and best friend meant more to me than you think. Although your feelings were more genuine and serious than mine, you managed to always stick by me in my time of need and reassured me that everything would be okay. Even though that boy continued to hurt me, you gave me purpose and a reason to keep trying and smiling even though it was still all about him.

You wiped my tears and threatened to put him in his place, but you never understood why I kept running back. To be honest, neither did I but I'm shocked you still supported me instead of bashing my stupid decisions. I think you should of put me in my place instead so I could open my eyes and see what was right for me. He continued to mess up over and over, but it didn't change my feelings for him, it only changed your feelings towards me.

You finally gave up on the thought of us after all this time and there is no on else to blame but myself. This silence I'm getting from you eats me alive, and I'm not sure how much longer I can take it. I'm not the center of your world anymore, but I think this change is healthy for you. Sometimes things don't work out the way we want them to, but I'm glad you are happier now that you don't waste your days with the burden of my problems that I somehow made your problems as well.

That boy means nothing anymore, but I'm far too late to steal you away. You're far gone and I've never felt so alone. A world without you by my side is no world I enjoy living in because I wouldn't want to walk the rest of my journey with anyone else by my side. I made promises I couldn't keep and disappointed you as each day passed. While those days were passing, I found my mind wrapped around the thought of you.

I couldn't let you go but I needed you to know how I felt even though the answers I heard tore me apart. With that being said I'm sorry for not noticing you sooner but just know I truly am thankful that you were a big part of my life. I now admire your fight for me and the courage to deal with what I put you through after all this time. You deserve nothing but the best, and I'm sorry I couldn't give that to you. I truly believe this was life's intention in the first place.

You can only hold on to someone for so long, but once you finally let them go that's when they want you the most. It's the thought of being let go that people will soon realize how much they actually crave your overall existence and part in their life. Then you vanish and they never thought the feeling of you vanishing would change their world completely.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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