Someone asked me this week, what advice you would give to someone who has been celibate for 10 years. Well, first off I’d give that person a round of applause. The fact that you’ve been faithful to yourself those years is a proof of strength.So here’s my opinion and words of advice for those who practice celibacy.

Dear community of celibate humans,

I’ve already started by congratulating you in your amazing strength. Let me continue by saying, your choice of lifestyle has saved you so much sexual heartbreak and saved you trips to the doctors. I respect, admire and can’t help but want to know more. Some say it’s religious reasons for choosing celibacy, others have just said they haven’t found the right one. I can’t help but wonder about the choice.

I always thought that celibacy was an important factor about having a relationship with oneself - actually I still do. You learn to date yourself and figure yourself out without the sex part - you just date without that idea in the back of your head. Like whether they are good in bed or do they know how to get kinky or can they satisfy me? Dating becomes such an interesting thing I feel. For instance, you must be straightforward about the celibacy to your date, when you are ready of course. And you never once think of that pleasure or arousal. It’s fascinating to hear stories of that sexual energy being transferred into other forms of energy.

It is really all about a mindset, sort of speaking. Is it a choice? That does depend on the person. Everyone works differently and so everyone will have a different reason for being celibate. Just know you aren’t alone and that there are many, among many people who practice celibacy. I remember when I did practice celibacy and that only lasted for a few seconds (metaphorically speaking), but I did feel some sort of liberation and freedom in those seconds. I do recommend that everyone at least tries to be celibate. It will give you understanding towards your sex life and give you a new way of thinking besides just sex.

I don’t have much advice on being celibate because I have never really practiced it; however, I can tell you that being celibate won’t give you a pregnancy scare or STD scare. It is a healthy lifestyle that could help prevent becoming infected by a STD, STI or become pregnant. Imagine a world of celibate people, our sexual transmitted diseases would decrease and also, our baby count will decrease.

After all I have said, I just wanted to reiterate my respect to those who are celibate. I applaud your effort. I have to say, re-reading all this, I am inspired to try a year of celibacy or maybe even longer. Remember to satisfy your needs by respecting yourself first and to never feel pressure by anything. Life should be lived through the efforts and healthy decisions we make. Continue to make your celibacy something important to yourself and when you are absolutely ready, go for whatever your heart desires - in reason of course.

Until next time.

Yours Truly,

J.