Dear Quiet Girl,

School, work and your social life can be hard when you’re shy or when you’re just a very introverted person. Your teachers and your parents may tell you to go out and meet people, try new things, and to stop being such a homebody. But that can be hard when every time you’re in a group of people larger than five you don’t know what to say or when you do say something it seems like no one is listening. You might get questions like “Why are you so quiet?” or “Why don’t you ever talk to me?” What you need to know is that being quiet is ok.

People may not understand that you’re quiet or shy, and may even think that because you’re quiet you must be stuck up or unfriendly. But that’s not true. Being quiet, shy or introverted is ok. Because you’re quiet you hear things other people don’t, you see things other people don’t and you may even be able to understand social situations better than some people who are super extroverted. If you like staying in and watching movies with your roommates or even by yourself, that’s ok. Everyone is different and everyone likes to spend their time differently. Just because you’re quiet doesn’t mean you don’t have friends. The number of friends you may have might be smaller but they’re more likely to be close, personal friends who will last for years.

It may seem hard to make friends because you’ll be sitting in class, next to several people who are always talking and laughing and you haven’t said a single word. If you’re ok with that then great! If not, sometimes all it takes is smiling at your neighbor everyday until they initiate conversation.

Being quiet doesn't make you weird. So you like sitting by yourself in class? That’s ok. So you don’t feel like going out on a Friday? That’s ok. You don’t have to feel as if you’re doing something wrong by being by yourself or by sitting quietly among a group of people. As long as you’re happy, everyone should be happy for you.

Love,

A Quiet Girl