Dear man from my past,
I'm not gonna say that you ruined my life, because you didn't. I'm still living today and my life is happy. It's happy because it's without you. You told me that I wasn't good enough, or pretty enough. You told me, "I wish I still had that one girl." That one girl who was too good for you, but gave you a chance, so you cheated and were caught. That one girl who told you she wouldn't forgive you for laying your boots under the bed of another woman. That one girl who you wished you still had, but you did her wrong, and now you have plain old me instead.
You told me all of the things I should change about myself to meet your standards, but when I said the smallest thing about you, you threatened me for being critical and hurting your feelings. "I'll break up with you," you said. "You're nothing without me." You used me as your toy. We looked happy when we took pictures for Instagram and Facebook or went out in public.
When we were alone, you always told me how lucky I was to be with someone like you, that I didn't deserve you. But you didn't deserve me. I made you treats, crafts and showered you with presents. I made a good relationship with your family. I had patience with you when you were in a jealous rage or simply felt like insulting me that day. I smiled and pretended I was happy because I knew that was what would keep you happy.
I did everything you ever asked of me, and why? Why did I do that to myself? The only result was the half-assed affection that you gave me every now and then. I craved that half-ass affection. You told me that you loved me, but you didn't love me. I loved you. I loved you even through all the abuse and putting down.
When you left me, I kept imagining your face when I was alone at night, your green eyes. My friends told me, "You can do so much better and we're glad he's gone," but I still dreamt of your soft skin. Now I have someone who laughs with me, holds me when I'm sad. He appreciates me for who I am and is gentle, so gentle. I sleep through the night knowing that he's fixing the mistakes that you made.
Sincerely,
Someone who's better without you.
