I always knew there was something wrong with me–almost different. I knew that my emotions were so over-the-top and over-stimulated that I must have some kind of disorder, or even disease, that could never be cured. My parents always labeled me as “emotional.” So that’s just what I began to believe–I was just emotional. I would come home from school completely overwhelmed from all of the homework I had to in such a short amount of time, and break down. Hours on end tears would fall down my face, and I had no idea why. I had absolutely no clue why not being able to solve a math problem would amount to me sobbing in my room for an hour. I was often told to “suck it up,” because it was all supposed to be OK, and I was expected to deal with it. People often reassured me by telling me that I was too in my head.

And yeah, sure, I knew everything was OK, but my mind was always racing, and by the time I was 16 years old, my anxiety was over the top. Why do I feel this way?

“You’re just emotional. Don’t let your emotions overtake you.”

My siblings would often criticize, and still criticize, my crying habits; as if there was something deeply wrong with crying. I began to believe that feeling things was wrong–a weakness.

Large crowds upset me, ordering food makes me more than nauseous, parties full of strangers is not my go to, busy stores makes me want to scream, too much happening all around me makes me feel overwhelmed, and there're some days I literally just can’t handle it.

If you’re like me, you’re probably a highly sensitive person. I first realized that I was a highly sensitive person when I was engaged in a deep conversation with my mom. I was probably crying [as usual], and she uttered something to me that made more sense to anything else ever did before. She said, “whatever someone else feels, you feel it ten times stronger.”

At first, I thought this meant I was weak, vulnerable, and over-emotional. People always seemed to tell me to “get over it,” or “stop being so emotional,” or “think positively.” And the very fact of the matter was, I was trying my hardest. I try, and tried every single day, to make the best out of every single situation. I didn’t mean, and never meant to be emotional. It’s just that highly sensitive people feel things on a deeper level than most people do.

So, I did some research. After researching, I came up with the conclusion that nothing was wrong with me. Absolutely nothing. Actually, I decided that being highly sensitive is sometimes…good. Highly sensitive people are empathetic. We are aware of our surroundings, the feelings of people around us, and every single emotion that others may somewhat miss. We can walk into a room full of strangers and immediately notice who is having a great day, or who is having the worst day, who is fighting with a spouse, or who is in tears. If people come to us teary eyed, it often times results in us crying as well. We can be the best friends, co-workers, or romantic partners, because not only can we listen to people, but we can literally feel for them.

I’ve grasped the fact that there will be days I just need to cry–especially the days everything seems to be overwhelming me. There are some days where I need to get alone to a quiet place and clear my head. There are many nights where going out just seems unbearable because the stimulation of noise and people would be just too much. Break ups, changes in relationships, moves, even a new set of classes, etc. can overwhelm me to an incredible extent.

But nothing is wrong with me.

Being highly sensitive means some days you will feel beaten down over absolutely nothing, but it is not, and never has it ever been a defect.

I’ve learned to use the fact that I am a HSP for good. People never have to be afraid to come to me with their problems, because I’m always here with a listening ear. I’d rather try and feel for the other person, than offer destructive criticism. I’d rather show the world that emotions are not bad, but good. What’s the point of having a world full of people with no sense of sensitivity and empathy? That in a world full of people who believe that showing no feelings at all is strength, I can provide light on the fact that exhibiting feelings definitely does not equal weakness.

The world needs a little bit of every type of personality, and without those highly-sensitives, I think the world would be at a loss.