Dear Her,
Imagine sitting in a dark room with glass shattered all around you. Inside all these little glass pieces are memories of the two of you together, the good and the bad. The good memories are cast away all around while the bad memories are slicing into your body. Inside your head, all you can hear is his voice and the words that broke you over and over again. He made you not want to love again. He made you fear the thought of getting close to someone again because he put you in this dark room. Once you're in, it feels as if there is no way out, but lucky for you, there is a light at the end of this tunnel.
When the two of you were happier, you put your heart and soul and entire being into the relationship because you were willing to fight for it and you were passionate about it. He made it seem like he was too, for a little bit. Then, one day, out of nowhere, he took all that you were and with five suffocating words he said "I don't love you anymore," and sucked the life out of you. Your entire world shattered around you and brought you into this dark room. Why should I love again? What is the point? Why am I going to let someone else in when this could happen all over again?
I still don't know the answers to those questions, but I'm willing to learn. If you sit around and let each guy pass you by because you're afraid of getting hurt, you are letting him win. He doesn't deserve that. You put your entire being out on the line for him and he kicked you aside as if it meant nothing. You don't owe him the satisfaction of you being miserable. You deserve someone who will put just as much of themselves into the relationship as you do.
You're just about ready to feel love again, but suddenly you stop. There is this gut-wrenching feeling in the pit of your stomach. You realize the guy across the room isn't him. This is the hardest part in breaking down your walls. It doesn't feel right to just let him go, even though he doesn't deserve even to cross your mind. All the memories and heartbreak come flooding back and the thought of being with the guy across the room makes you want to vomit. It's not him. You will have to go through the 'get to know you' process all over again. You'll fall in love. He'll break your heart. Thus, the cycle repeats. Why do people put themselves through this constantly? Is love really worth all this pain? I don't know. But, I like to hope that it is.
You're in that dark room again. This time its different. He no longer has control over you. The only one keeping you there is you. Stand up. Open the door. Free yourself of him.
Love,
A girl in your shoes
