We had such a great run. You sent me good morning texts more than my boyfriend did. We were attached at the hip at one point. Had everything in common, loved being with each other. We even went to college together.
We had different personalities, and that’s okay. They always say opposites attract, right? I can talk to a wall and make friends with it, and you need some time to make friends and that is perfectly okay. We were different, who cares? I loved you like a sister. You became part of the family. My mom would go grocery shopping and bring home your favorite snacks because you were always at my house.
I was always so loyal to you. I would drop everything if you ever needed me, and at one point you would do the same for me. But then it started to feel like work. Like I was always walking on egg shells around you. I knew that’s not how a friendship worked and it wasn’t okay, but I pretended that it was. I would make excuses for your behavior, not only to other people but to myself as well. You started making me feel horrible about myself. You weren’t comforting, you weren’t sensitive, you were cold. You started becoming a hypocrite, getting angry at things that were absolutely fine if you did them. Being your friend started to take a toll on my other friendships, but I chose to ignore that because in my mind, you were the most important friend I had. I stopped talking to people because you said they were bad energy. You had some sort of hold on me that I still to this day don’t understand.
One day, you decided to end our friendship without telling me. We had different lives I’ll admit. We were now in different places in our lives. I was busy, you were busy. Did I not give you enough attention? Did you feel abandoned by me? If you did, I am truly sorry and you should know that was never my intention. I felt hurt by you. Confused. How can we go from being practically sisters to strangers? How can you just end a friendship that was so special and important? Maybe to me it was special, but I guess that same feeling didn’t reside with you.
Hurt eventually turned into anger. A lot of things happened in my life, scary things and where were you? Nowhere. Not a text, a call, a Facebook message, nothing. Do I mean that little to you? And the worst part was I still had no idea what I did for you to completely cut me out of your life. It just happened.
I do need to thank you. You have taught me at such an early age what a real friend is. A real friend doesn’t make you feel guilty for being yourself. A real friend is always there for you whether you’re angry with her or not. And most importantly, a real friend doesn’t belittle you.
I don’t regret our friendship, not for one second. It was a great thing, it just turned volatile. I wish you the very best with everything you do because I know how hard you work. Do I think you feel the same way towards me? No, I sadly don't. That's just the type of person you've become. I do sincerely hope that you find your happiness and live a great life. I'm not angry anymore, not bitter. I've accepted that you wanted to end our friendship for whatever your reasoning was. I just wish that you would've told me. Maybe that way, we could've fixed whatever was broken.
