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From A Cancer Patient's Child

The things we've left unsaid.

3
From A Cancer Patient's Child
The Star

Dear Cancer Patient’s Kid,

You know who you are. You may be the one who seems to go “unnoticed” when chemo, radiation, surgery, and relaxation time comes around

You are the kid who always hears, “Hey, how’s your dad doing?” or even maybe, “Hey, how is your mother dealing with all of this?”

Sure, you don’t let people think that stuff like that bothers you. But let’s be honest, sometimes it just does. I know that sometimes you may just want some attention, but that just doesn’t seem to happen. People are always coming up to you asking how everyone else is doing, but hey! What about us?

These are the kids who had to grow up way too fast. This is for the kids who had so much expected from them when other kids got to stay kids. They got to watch other kids make mistakes, while they had so much more expected of them.

You are the kid who knows way too many medical terms. You know all the medicines, treatments, forms of radiation, and just all the cancer terms. You’ve heard it all. You have heard of this “miracle cure” that your parent just has to try. You know that the doctors are doing their best, but sometimes you just want it all to be over.You know that you got like next to no sleep throughout the years. You were always wondering, What is going to happen next? Will they be okay? Is this treatment the last round of treatment? These are just some of the questions that go through your mind at night.

One of the best things about being a cancer patient's kid is hearing those responses. They are the responses that people give because they have no idea what else to say, but they just feel the need to say something.

I am so sorry to hear that..” (Why are you even sorry? You didn’t bring the cancer upon them..)

“I am always here for you..” (You are just saying that to comfort me. Please don’t do that. It’s really not what I need right now; empty promises are the last thing I want to deal with right now..)

“Everything is going to be okay.” (Oh really? Can you promise that?)

I know that people think that they are helping. Often times they just feel like they have to say something, but they don’t. Sometimes silence is better than anything at all. As the kid though, you are too kind. You can’t tell people how you really feel, because it’s not about you. You just have to be nice and pretend that you are okay.

Cancer affects the family as a whole. People who do not know much about cancer do not understand. It does not just take a toll over its prey, but the prey’s entire family. So here’s to the kids who feel unnoticed throughout this disease's journey. You are not alone.

Yours Truly,

A Cancer Patients' Kid

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