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To Anyone Who Practices The Art Of Procrastination

This article is for you.

Mackenzie Rappe

Apr 18, 2016

Buena Vista University

To Anyone Who Practices The Art Of Procrastination

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Those in high school think they know procrastination. In reality, college students rule this artform. It's most likely your major in college is, or will be, the Practice of Procrastination with a focus track in YouTube-and-other-things-you-shouldn’t-be-doing-instead-of-studying-for-a-test-or-writing-that-20-page-paper. I know, quite an extensive major. I’m just as impressed as you are. This is the perfect little article for those of you out there that love to procrastinate, as this article really has no point except for you to spend your time doing something else rather than what you should be doing.

Welcome to the beautiful world of PROCRASTINATION!

I'm going to see how long any of you actually continue to read this article. Also, how many of you are reading this article to procrastinate some other form of work? Because currently that’s what I’m doing. We’ll actually I’m writing it so I'm doing something, but still you get the point. And I am writing this because Nick and I have similar feelings. Beginning a paper is the WORST!

I, like yourself, have other stuff I should be doing, but find it incredibly irresistible to continue clicking on that next BuzzFeed video. The worst is when you search ‘solving linear equations’ on YouTube, (totally with the intent of learning) and end up on "How Oscar the Kitten Saved Planet Earth." YouTube is some crazy mindtrap that takes you away from reality, and doesn't let you out... until three hours later.

You start at 5 p.m. and look at the clock again and it’s 10:15 p.m… Great, now an essay is due in two hours. Power time! For some reason, procrastinators are great at pumping out essays like they all of a sudden unlocked the answers to the universe! But then food sounds really nice. Should I eat a snack? Muffins sound really nice, but what kind?

Then the sad reality of how broke you are hits you like a truck and end up eating Ramen Noodles again. Sometimes you wonder, is this is all you will ever eat again and cry a little inside. Then you start to look up Ramen noodle recipes online and find a plethora of amazing deliciousness! You keep searching, but realize you have no way to cook with the exception of this magical thing called a microwave. It’s sort of like the, Back to the Future one but not as cool. Also, the lack in adequate table placements. Most of the time pots, pans or tortillas work out for dishware in the end. Anything to save you from doing dishes.

Then you start looking on Amazon for cool microwaves and get lost on there for what feels like a few minutes but is actually an hour. But hey, you found a really cool new iPhone case. The random thought sometimes occur to you, "When was the last time I did laundry?" *sniffs clothes* Now it is a well know college hack, all you do is spray Febreze on them and you're good, or so you like to tell yourself that. I should probably do laundry, but fit the whole basket of clothes in one wash because it costs like $4 for one load.

Oh, look at the time! Can’t do that now because that essay is almost due. I should probably start that…

Or maybe not...

Sincerely,

College Student

(*Disclaimer, I am way more productive than what this article makes me out to be... most of the time*)

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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