I would like to say thank you. Thank you to the “man” who decided he did not want a daughter, to the man who decided to walk away and never look back. Because of that decision you made 20 years ago I have had an amazing life. I have gone to great schools, made great friends, had amazing opportunities, and I have become, what I consider to be an amazing young lady.
When I was young people would ask me why I had a different last name and it was traumatizing to me to have to explain it. Instead of telling the truth I often just told them that my mother wanted me to have her maiden name. What a joke right? As I grew up I just realized it was not worth the lie, it was not worth making up stories or anything to be ashamed about. I had nothing to be ashamed about if anyone should be ashamed it should be you. I used to wonder if you thought about me on my birthday, thought about missing my graduation, missing my life. I don’t do that anymore, because I know it does matter. I have other people to take your place for those events since you decided not to.
Because of your decision to leave I now have a real father, a father who I argue with, yell at, and disagree with but a father who cares about me. A father who picks my boyfriend and I up from concerts at one in the morning so we don’t have to drive after we have been drinking. A father who has been to every single big event in my life. A father who will one day walk me down the aisle. Thanks to you I have a real dad, a dad that instead of walking out of my life, he walked into it.
Because of your decision to leave I have three younger siblings who keep my world spinning. Your decision to leave gave me the opportunity to learn how to be a big sister. I have grown up being the oldest and being the example but I would not change that for the world. Being the oldest has taught me how to be a leader and a good example. It has taught me how to love unconditionally. It has taught me how to be the bigger person. Being an older sister has helped make me into the person I am today.
Because of your decision to leave I have a bond with my mother that most daughters don’t get the opportunity to have. It was just her and I for five years and though I don’t remember every bit of those five years, I know that because of them my mom is my best friend. I know that because of those five years my mom is the strongest woman I know.
Because you decided to leave I have a family that did not have to be my family, they took me in. I have two Grandparents who care about me deeply and make me feel like I am one of their own. I have cousins that have become my friends and memories that will never fade.
Because of you leaving I am a strong, independent, hard-working, and caring young woman who is grateful that you never decided to grow up and be a father. I am grateful that you walked out of my life because that made it possible for so many people to walk into it. So thank you, for not being my dad and thank you for not being man enough to ever be.