I don't even know where to start, man.
I miss you often and constantly think back to the time we spent together. You were there for me in the downward spiral part of my life and I got better and left you behind. Maybe that's not how it really is, but it is how it really feels.
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I promise to never forget the memories that we shared. From me staying at your house anywhere from days to weeks at a time to late night Mario Kart and Donkey. I promise to always be grateful for what you have done for me and who you have been towards me. You are such a welcoming soul and I hope you never lose sight of that.
I remember swimming after dark and visiting your relatives. I remember crying about boys. I remember the way you always forgave me for the times I canceled plans. I remember going on late night walks. I remember the breakdowns and the parties. I remember you completely accepting me into your friend group and helping me make more friends. I remember you always checking on me and understanding me. I remember when you threw me a birthday party during an ice storm. I remember watching things together like "Shrooms," "Alice in Wonderland," "Criminal Minds," etc. I remember our late night laughing fits, dictionary, why do words like that even exist?
I remember telling you I liked girls in the McDonald's parking lot. I remember when we dated, maybe you don't want that in here, but it matters to me. You helped me take such a large step in being OK with being bisexual. You were my first girlfriend and it was apparent. I was awkward, but even after we broke up, you still wanted to be my best friend again.
I remember the rabbits and the wild nights. I remember the adventures. I remember the summers we spent hanging out. I remember the tears that have been shed. I remember you making me ramen for weeks straight. I remember hoping we would always be each others' stone. I remember the advice you always gave me. I remember dying my hair blue. I remember the Skype calls when I lived ten minutes away. I remember you letting me be part of your family. I remember you accepting me for who I am. I remember The Wombats. I remember those damn, entitled tree frogs.
You have witnessed every flaw that courses through my being and still never turned away my friendship, even today. You have been there to see me have anxiety attacks and you've supported me through them. You know the things that keep me up at night and always know what to say to lift me up.
You never looked at me like I was a bad person. You never looked down on me and we both know you have reason to. You have always been on my side and still are. College tears me down and makes me feel horrible most days, but you have never found me horrible. That means the world to me and it always will.
You're still here for me to this day and this isn't a goodbye letter at all. It's an appreciation letter. I know that I don't come over anymore when I'm home and I don't message you every day anymore. You understand that I've been busy, you were always good like that. You get busy, too and our lives are going in different directions. We are growing up, we're not just kids trying to pass high school anymore, we're women whose lives never slow down.
You're in a relationship now and I hope that you are happy with where your life is. You deserve to have a good life and a friend that comes around more. You deserve to be happy. You deserve every good thing in life that you can get and I hope your dreams become your future.
I will always be your best friend and a supporting backbone when you need one. I hope you continue to have a great life and will continue to want me as part of it. You're a great person and I'm lucky to have you in my life. I'll love you forever, dude.
