Dear fellow control freak,
I bet it took you a long time to own up to being a control freak, didn't it? You thought, “No, I’m not a control freak! I'm super fun and spontaneous! Control freaks are nags who everyone hates being around; that’s not me. I'm awesome, and I have tons of friends.” Don't worry. I too have lots of deep, meaningful friendships that probably wouldn’t exist if it weren't for my control freak type personality.
As you enter into your first year of college, a lot about you is going to change. Your friends, your vocabulary, the way you dress and most importantly, the amount of control you have over what’s going on in the world around you. Contrary to popular belief, all this new freedom you've been handed when you moved out of your parents house and into your dorm room is really just a cute sweater that’s been put on the reality of how crazy things are about to get.
You don't have any control over when your roommate leaves her makeup powder all over the bathroom sink. You have no control over the amount of crumbs that same roommate will leave on the floor until you finally give up and vacuum them for her. You have no control over how much you are going to love the same girl you've found so many reasons to complain about.
Your bond with your roommate, almost all of your friendships and your first year of college will be a happy accident, and believe me. Those kinds of friendships are the best kind and result in some of the fondest memories of your time on campus. You have no control over how you will react to your first failure. I watched a handful of my friends and myself crumble into pieces over the first failed paper or exam. College is hard. Please, believe me and your mom when we say that. Being able to scrape up all the pieces and do better next time is invaluable in your success both in school and as a person.
Soon, you will realize that your love of control also makes you an amazing leader, and that is a skill that you are born with. In no time at all, you will receive leadership positions, and in some cases, they will be handed to you without asking. Before you let all that power go to your head, remember that everyone needs help sometimes, and it's okay to admit that you don't know everything or that you’re in over your head. Everyone around you is going through the exact same thing, and they are just as scared as you are. A true leader is open and willing to admit they have faults, even if that means possibly losing control all together. Never ever get too proud to let people help you. Remember, mom is just a phone call away, and she wants to help you.
Finally, you have no control over how much you will love school. Without noticing it, you will start to fall into place, and everything will start to feel normal again. Your tiny dorm room you didn't even really like thinking about will become one of your favorite places to be. The roommate you thought you will never even get along with will be the one you stay up with into the early hours of the morning and tell all your secrets to. Your grades will fall into place even if you have to change your major once or twice (or in my case four times). You will start to love going to classes and getting to know people with a passion and drive for the same things as you.
One day without realizing it, you’ll notice that all those high school t-shirts you left behind have been replaced with brand new ones with your university’s name on it. You proudly wear it when your mom finally convinces you to come home one weekend. During holidays, you’ll miss being within walking distance of all your closest friends and being able to get food at 3 a.m. without your mother asking you if you’ve gone completely insane.
Little control freak, dream big, make huge plans and set goals bigger than you can ever imagine. At the end of the day, don't forget that sometimes we have to let go of our own plans that we are so desperately holding onto, so we can grab onto the ones God has in store for us.
Signed with lots and lots of love and very little control,
Dia Delso
