I no longer feel anger towards you. I wondered for so long who I was. I thought that because I didn't know half of my blood that I was somehow missing something. I felt worthless. I thought to myself how in the world can a man love me if my own father doesn't.
In my most vulnerable of times, I struggled with the fact that you didn't want me. You could have watched me grow into the person that I have become, but you didn't. You had a choice to be in my life. I thought that the fact that my own father didn't want me, it defined me. I was wrong. I am so worthy. I am deserving, and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.
You have missed so much. From my first dance to my first day of college, and you'll continue to miss everything. You won't see me graduate, you won't walk me down the aisle, and you won't get to see me follow my dreams. You'll never get that back, but I don't care anymore. What I have been through, and the struggles that I have faced have brought me to where I am today, and I can't complain. I have the best of friends, I have an amazing family, and that's all I really need.
My mom was always the person that I could count on for anything and everything. She raised my sister & I without you. I know times were hard for her, but she did it. The way I am today is all because of her. She helped me become the woman I am supposed to be all because you couldn't even be a man when you needed to. My mom is so strong, with her raising me on her own I realized that any woman in this world can do anything she puts her mind to. It is always nice to have that support from someone, but when you don't have that it can be hard.
As I began to get older I realized that me being sad wasn't going to make you come back. I couldn't let you affect my life any longer. It was hard growing up without you. Like I said, As I got older, all I really wanted was for you to see how good I am doing and how happy I am without you. I do not need you in my life. It is your loss that you don't want an awesome daughter, but when I have children of my own, I never want them to feel the pain of not having their father around. I will make sure my child's father knows that I won't put my child in the pain that you put me.
I look back on this time of my life and just realize that maybe it is good that you weren't in my life because I wouldn't have the bond that I have my mother. I might've never noticed how strong my mom was or I wouldn't have been as strong as I am today.
So, I thank you for leaving my life.
Whoever you are, I hope you read this. I hope you understand that you have missed out on one of the best opportunities in your life. I could've been your daughter. I could have been your little girl. Now I am neither, nor will I ever be.
Love,
Your daughter
