I've struggled with my body image since middle school.
I always thought I'd be happy with myself if I just lost a couple pounds, or if I was more toned, or if I was stronger. I struggled with accepting myself for who I was, and often found myself skipping meals. As I got older, I started to become more patient with myself and how I looked. I spent this past summer surrounded by awesome friends and even better food. I chalked up added weight to my frequent trips to new restaurants and late night snacking with friends. I tried not to weigh myself too often, but I noticed little by little when certain clothes didn't quite fit. Classes started back up and I started to get frustrated because although I had started to lose my appetite, I still seemed to be gaining weight. I reasoned with myself that I had been so stressed with my course load and new major. A couple months ago I was made aware of a medical condition I have. It finally made sense why I had slowly gained almost 20 pounds over the course of a year but it was so hard for me to be okay with gaining weight. I've spent the last couple months starting to accept myself and how I look. With spring in full swing, and summer around the corner I felt I needed to apologize to my body. I should be so grateful that my body is fully functioning. Even with my condition, it still works day in and day out. Instead of focusing on how much I weigh, or what I look like, I need to be focusing on everything I can do, so here I go.
Dear Body,
Thank you, for everything you can do. You are hands down a perfect body. You wake up every morning, you can see, you can walk, there's so much you can do but I still talk bad about you, and criticize you. I do not show you the love and respect you deserve. It doesn't matter what you weigh. It doesn't matter how toned you are, or how strong you are. You are more than what you look like in a bikini. You are everything you can do. You carry me through life. I eat food to fuel you, to give you energy. You should not be deprived of food. You should not be compared to other bodies. You should be praised for your uniqueness. Instead of being mad at you for growing, or waging a war on myself, I need to accept you and go out to get you better fitting clothes. You are beautiful. You need to be flaunted, rejoiced, and loved. I am so sorry for the constant negativity I have towards you. So here's to treating you right, loving you, and finally being happy in my own skin this spring and summer. You deserve it.