First of all, I wanted to say thanks for giving me life. It isn't something you should take for granted because I know it was a difficult thing to do, putting me up for adoption before even knowing who I was or what I would become. I want to tell you that I am not a juvenile delinquent and have never been in trouble with the law. Except for the one time I got pulled over for running a stop sign (I'll admit that was my fault). My life has been fantastic, I am in college, and am a firefighter, while also working a full-time job during breaks.

I want you to know that I am not angry at you for giving me up, even though I was only three days old. I get that you wanted to have a better life for me. It worked out great, to this day it is still something that I hold special to my heart. I have no hard feelings for or against either one of you. Putting me up for adoption I am sure was not an easy choice, and it may have been a decision that lingered on in your mind for a while. But enough of that, it's time to say how I feel.

I turn 20 this July as you may or may not remember. But I am sure that you might because, how can one forget the day they give birth. I only know several things about you, which isn't much and I wish I knew more. It's just me constantly being curious and wanting the basic answers in life. I know that your (my birth mom) name was April and that I had two half-sisters. After that, I don't know anything else. My adoptive parents have been supportive of me through everything that I have dealt with in my life, I hope that you would've done the same. I don't know anything about my father (birth father) and I wish I did. Nothing against my adoptive parents, cause they are awesome. Me and my adoptive dad are best friends and do everything together and I don't know if I would want it any other way.

There have been a lot of things in my life worth mentioning, and I know the likelihood of you reading this is slim to none because I don't know where you are or what you are doing with your life but I just want to say some of the following to see how much I have grown.

1. I graduated High School- I mean almost everyone does but it was something that I thought was an accomplishment

2. I won an Emmy- I decided to do TV in High School and won a legit Emmy for my work in sports.

3. I graduated from the fire academy and became a firefighter- I still do run into burning buildings and I absolutely love what I do.

4. I went to college- I decided to go to Shippensburg which is just like home, and I still plan on working in TV.

5. I had my heart broken- As everyone goes through life, it happens at least once. For me, multiple times but such is life.

6. I learned how to drive- I have been driving for almost four years now, and have never been in an accident.

7. I joined a fraternity- Some of the best friends and brothers I have ever had in my life I met through my frat, and it is the family I always have wanted but never had.

8. I played sports in High School- I was on the bowling team for a couple of years and enjoyed what I did.

9. I saved my money from working and bought a car- Hard work pays off, and I think you would have wanted me to do that.

10. I made mistakes- No one is perfect, I have regrets in life, but it made me a better person and I am thankful for that.

11. I am Santa- For my fire department, I played Santa Claus for several years, giving children smiles and bringing them joy for the holidays, something that I am sure you would have done for me.

I know that my adoptive parents love me with all of their hearts. I am the only child for them, and it made me a little spoiled, and sometimes I needed to be humbled. I know that I have two half-sisters.

I want you to know that I have no hard feelings towards them.

Actually out of all of this, I hope to at some point in my life actually have the opportunity to meet you. It is something that I have wanted since I was old enough to realize what adoption was. I know that it may be hard for you to do this, but anything from you would be great. Adoption is not an easy thing to talk about, let alone actually do on either side. Your decision made my parents very happy people, and I hope your life was better off without having a burden like me. I know that I am not a burden now since I am an adult. This is something I have been waiting for a long time to address. Knowing where I came from and who I really am is all I want.

I hope that throughout all of this calamity in the world, and the chaos that lies within, that through a miracle you somehow get this. Knowing that it is not likely that you would ever see me, or see this also is okay. It just allows me to get the thoughts that I have had in my head for the longest time out. Many people don't realize that I am adopted and they give me sympathy for it. I look at your decision as something that was mutually beneficial for both of us. You wanted something better for me that you could not give yourself.

I hope that throughout all of this, this letter reaches you in some fashion. Response not needed, just reading this would make me feel better.

Best,

The Son you had, but didn't.