Dear Dad,
I have spent the last year taking the time to learn what truly makes me happy and who truly brings me happiness. They say the best stories are the ones that you do not necessarily want to write, but mine has helped me learn what I value and what I need in my life going forward. I don't know if you will ever even read this and I am not writing this to hurt your feelings, but instead I am writing this to thank you for helping me to grow into the person I am today.
I always grew up wanting to be a "daddy's girl," and when I realized that other things were a priority over me, it altered my perspective on how I started to live my life. I never had the opportunity to be daddy's little girl, because you ruined any chance of us having a relationship when you'd came home too drunk to realize you were yelling at me for no reason.
I grew tired of getting my hopes up for someone who was never going to show, getting into pointless and emotionally draining arguments, being told I wasn't good enough for anyone to love, and the constant excuses as to why alcohol seemed to be a higher priority over me.
I finally grew tired of walking on egg shells to please someone who couldn't care less about the effort I was putting in to impress them—but it wasn't all bad.
The sad truth is that I will forever picture you as the man yelling loud violent words at my face, in order to put me "in my place". But from these experiences, you taught me to get back on my feet and stand up for myself when I get knocked down. Your actions have taught me to watch what I say, because words matter and have a greater affect on someone than you may think, especially if they are coming from someone who is supposed to love you unconditionally.
You have shown me how easily alcohol can tear a family apart and I never want my future family to know that kind of pain. On the other hand, your dependency on alcohol has helped to strengthen the relationship I have with my mom, brother, and sister, and for that I am incredibly grateful. We all had to step up to help cover the responsibilities that you tended to forget about, and that not only pushed us closer together, but it helped me to mature and learn what it means to put others before myself.
I spent years trying to accept your irrational and inappropriate behavior, but looking back now I realize that through it all you helped me to see what I truly value. You have helped to show me how I should be treated by a boy, what it means to stand up for yourself, and how good things can come out of not so good situations. I sincerely hope you get better one day, but until then thank you for shaping me into the person I am.
Sincerely,
Your Daughter
