If you're trying to love yourself, its tough. Its tough if you're just starting to learn that that means, and its tough if you're trying to pick yourself out of a depression for what you hope is the the last time. Nobody can really tell you what to love, what not to love, and how to love it. But inside you, theres more to love than you'll ever know, and this is my open letter to you.
Dear (insert your name here),
I know its hard not to compare yourself to others. I know its hard to see past those small imperfections that get larger in the mirror as the day goes on. And those beauty magazines that tell you to "Be Yourself"? They want you to be yourself by being someone else, so throw that out. You know what is beautiful? Life. Life is made of imperfections, impurities, mistakes, and flaws. No tree is smooth, no rock is perfectly round, no leaf is symmetrical and intact for long. And just as the world is changing, so are you.
The truth is, love isn't perfect. Love is messy, love is categorized and qualified and bashed. But love lives within us all, love is one quality to say we were all born with. Forget what your house is supposed to look like, forget that your hair is getting unruly. Forget that you feel naked without makeup, and forget that you hate yourself naked.
Learn to love what nobody else can love about you. Love the way your shadow looks in the sunlight. Love how you dream in colors that you can't describe when you wake up, or love that you dream in grays. Love yourself with the same hatred you have for early mornings, late nights, or spilled coffee. Love the fact that you're still learning to love yourself.
It does't have to be about your body. Love that you can see the colors in the leaves on the trees as they change, or love how it smells right after it rains. Love the feelings of your favorite sweater or book or disproportionate memories of an old childhood classic that just doesn't have the same magic it did when you were little.
Appreciate the confidence you have when you're alone, and hang onto that. Don't feel that the words or silent judgements of others matter, because they too need some work on themselves. Appreciate silence and appreciate your own laughter, because joy is experienced by you uniquely. Clap for yourself because you know every fiber of your being. You know the weight your bones can carry and you know the pressure your chest has felt, and you've conquered it all. You don't need to climb a mountain, or save a life, or hear the praises of others to know that you are worth the love and compassion and beauty that the world around you has to give.
It just starts within you. Clap for that.